...maybe redemption has stories to tell...

ahem

2006-07-26T03:19:00.000+08:00

parang wala nang nangyayari dito ah...

*subconscious*: sarap burahin mga past posts ko ah...GRRR.

anyway...update naman peeps.

uh-oh

2006-02-24T00:39:00.000+08:00

15 fuckin days to go...

tomorrow...my ex-Anxa officemates are hosting a despedida party for me. AWWWWWWWWWW!!! damn it... how sweet huh?! no one has ever planned or organized a very big party for me. ever.

i love you guys. forever.

mwah!

...maybe redemption has stories to tell...

2006-02-01T19:26:00.000+08:00

i didn't know how words could hurt one person so much...

i learned that just about 5 mins ago..

i wanted to cry..

i wanted to breakdown..

pero i can't..

i have lost almost all of my dignity..

might as well save the last bit that i have..

they don't know what they are asking of me..

they don't know how i tried..

they don't FUCK!NG know how i struggle each and everytime we hit road block..

they just don't FUCK!NG know..

I know im right

2006-01-17T21:04:00.000+08:00

i know im right

#!@$^!!! dont even try and turn things around.

dont even try and put the blame on me.

I quit. Ayoko na. Ayawan na.

*sigh*

bahala na nix kung kelan tau magkita.. that depends if i even have the strength..

she's draining me dry.

she's killing me.

I quit. Ayoko na. Ayawan na.

new layout for 2006

2006-01-15T23:09:00.000+08:00

woopee new layout!!! hehehe. aba at bago na rin ang blogthis interface ahhhh... hehehe pramis. ang galeng galeng nman. sana magpasok na rin sila smileys nohhhhh...

rey... wats the prob frend? kelan na ba tyo kita?! ndi pede dis coming week... how about d week after dis wk? hehehe.

wala ako makwento.............. away-bati kami ni anj. ok. tapos na away namen ahehehe. i wuv him so much. sumtyms naaawa din ako sa knya kz i can be too hard on him... pero nasa rason nman ako noh.

agh! tama na nga yan... enjoyin ko muna tong layout. ndi ako gano nahirapan dito. buti na lng. ndi ako inabot ng kalahating araw dito... buti na lng (agen). hehehe. cge ako'y matutulog na... i think. hehehe. nyt nyt to all of you! sa uulitin! mwah!

p.s. radio.blog is under construction... go to my other blog site... mas OK dun ung radio blog... full albums pa. heheh. ok nyt!

...

2006-01-13T03:07:00.000+08:00

Ala makausap..

Ala magawa..

Gusto ko magmuni muni...

*sigh*

Unfair

2006-01-12T12:04:00.000+08:00

Just when you thought life has given you all the sh*t it can throw at you... WELL, GUESS AGAIN!!

How can someone you are with almost 24/7, 7 days a week tell you that THEY FEEL REJECTED AND ABANDONED??

!#@&&^%*$!!

TANG $% naman e!

That's how you feel? How about how I feel?

Bullcrap!

Sorry just venting out..

Minsan n lang magpost.. init pa ng ulo..

*sigh*

forever blogger

2005-12-28T11:10:00.000+08:00

namiss ko magpost dito sa blogger hehehe. i think i won't ever leave blogger... kasi dito lang ako nakakapagtagalog ng husto heheh. sa isa kong site kailangan minimal lang. para mabasa ng lahat. andito rin mga friends ko sana nman minsan magblog sila. SANA NAMAN KAHIT MINSAN LANG. iniiwan nila ako dito. shet nman o.

HOYYYYYYYYYYY ASAN NA KAYO?! JO-JOIN JOIN KAYO PERO NDI KAYO NAGBBLOG heheh. JOWK. pinilit ko ba kayo sumali!? kasi nman para ndi ako lonely =.( hmp!

sino gus2 maging part/member ng blog ko? para ndi ako mag-isa dito hehehe.

HI JOHANNA. BUTI PA C JOHANNA NAGSASALITA! SI GEE AT SI DIANE! NAGSASALITA! PERO UNG IBA NA MEMBERS MISMO NG BLOG NA TOH! NDI! KINALIMUTAN NA AKO! HMP! heheh. oy minsan lang ako magdrama... pagbigyan nyo na.

kailangan ko na palitan skin ng blogger ko. nagsasawa nako hehehe. sige.. papalitan ko na! mwah! sana umayos lang noh...hehehe. ayoko na ng palpak...

gifts

2005-12-23T14:16:00.000+08:00

thanks johanna for the gift! aheehee...touching nman. ung iba pang mga gifts... nasa isa ko pang site. anyway... thanks guys. napapakalma nyo ako hehehe. honga... easy lang dapat ako... pero kasi andaming mga peste sa buhay talaga eh. grrrrr! i swear malapit nako magbago ng cell number. shit. anyway... merry christmas to all! mwah!

no matter what OK?

2005-12-21T18:20:00.000+08:00

Wala nman ako ginagawa ngayon kundi i-train tong mga papalit saken na mga teddy bear designers. Hehehe. Pero nakakatuwa naman kasi... nakikinig sila saken ng husto. And nong tinuruan ko sila sa Premiere... nong 2nd time na nag-edit na sila ng video...maayos na talaga. Altho may konti pang pwedeng ayusin... ok na rin naman. What a success.

Shit. Ndi pa rin ako tinatantanan ni Ms. X. Dati bitch ako...ngayon "Biatch" na daw ako. I swear. Is she tryign to be funny? Natawa kasi talaga ako nong nabasa ko na tinawag nyako biatch. Kasama ko pa nga baby ko non. Tinanong nya saken ano tinext ni bruka. Ayun. Biatch. I mean hellurrrrrrr... ndi kita seseryosohin dyan. Para ka lang nagpapatawa. And seriously hon... it's getting old already. Tama na. Mghanap ka nman ng ibang insulto. Tangina.

And please lang... quit whining!!! Move on. Ako pa bitch ngayon. Sino kaya namba-blackmail...I mean... how!? How do you think you can gain love if you blackmail someone?! You blackmail him so he would love you back again?! NASISIRAAN KA NA BA NG BAIT?!?!? STUPIDEST THING TO DO. Magisip-isip ka naman! Pramis! Pasalamat ka mahal ko baby ko... kaya ndi kita pinapatulan... pasalamat ka may konti pako respeto sayo at kaya ko pa magpigil... kung wala lang ako pinag-aralan... sinungalngal na kita at inupakan na kita...

Tumahimik ka na pwede?! No matter what you say... no matter what you do...NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS... NO MATTER WAT FUCKIN HAPPENS... NO MATTER WHAT B-I-T-C-H...... ndi ikaw ang masusunod. There's more to life than just bitching and whining dahil ndi mo na makukuha pa uli gus2 mo... move on dear. MOVE ON.

I hate Uma.

2005-12-17T20:51:00.000+08:00

I posted this from my other blog...but I just want to post it again... kasi tuwing naaalala ko si Lolo (Uma)... kumukulo talaga ang dugo ko. Here's what happened last Thursday.

My boss talked to me regarding my resignation. It really didn't go well. He called me unprofessional because I'm leaving so soon.

AMF...

Look... I told him about my whole Canada thing 2 months ago... did he do anything?! Did he recruit new people in our department? We used to be 5 in our department (2 web designers, and 3 mobile application designers, but all of us are graphic artists... so I'm one of the mobile app designers — we call ourselves MADs).

Anyway, one of the MADs left just last month. So 2 na lang kami. 1 of the web designers left rin and joined the ex-MAD who just left last month. So now we're down to 3. I told HIM about my situation 2 friggin' months ago. But did he do something about it? Like... I don't know... maybe find my replacement? Maybe... let me train some of the designers here for our sister company... make them do some real designing instead of just deleting the backgrounds of teddy bear images?!

Yes. Believe it or not... that's just what they do. Imagine, Winnie The Pooh. There are series of images of Winnie... I think it's about 16 images max... Winnie turned 360 and every image is one angle of him just sitting in the middle of a pedestal... of some friggin studio. Now... these designers use the ERASER tool in Photoshop to delete the white background... actually... DELETE everything except Winnie. This includes skill as well because Winnie's fur must stay intact. Thou shall maintain the fur. Thou shall maintain the illusion of fur.

That's not all. This is just one batch of images. Next batch... Eeyore. Next... Piglet. LOL. The whole gang! Not just Winnie and the gang. There are all sorts of teddy bears and teddy animals. I edited a teddy rat. LOL. There are teddy dolphins... teddy cows... teddy bird. ???

Enough with the teddy stuff. So... instead of them wasting their skills on teddy stuff. Why not give them real work right?! After I told Uma (coz he looks just like UMA) my situation, my direct supervisor told me to prepare training documents. And that's what I did. Still... no replacements to train. He seems to be calm.

I thought I could give my resignation now and leave the company by January... that was my first plan. But everything seemed to happen too fast... things change... many factors to consider... I have to leave ASAP. I know it's my fault... I know I should have passed my resignation paper last month maybe. But I didn't know that things would not go my way. Plans do change. And it's not like I have a choice whatsoever. I cannot control this.

But then... UMA tells me... "No... I'm tired of this... you should've done this... that... we don't have a replacement you should know... it's not organized and you should have done this... and that..."

It's MY FAULT that your company is sooo disorganized? It's MY FAULT you don't have an honest to goodness HR department? And that you depend on your secretary and receptionist to do the recruiting for you? Because you have no money to invest on a real HR person?

I told him, "Sir are YOU blaming ME for the recruitment..." -- then he cut me off... sensing probably that it was not my fault.

Damn right it's not my fault. What an ass!!!

He had all the time to find a replacement... but did he budge? And now he's blaming me why everything is so fucked up and now he has to find a replacement. HELLO!!! EARTH TO UMA. Shouldn't you have thought of that 2 months ago??? And now you're telling me I'm not even thinking about the company? Call me unprofessional if I mentioned the visa when I just handed my resignation paper. Call me insensitive. Call me a fuckin bitch if you want for being so inconsiderate. But I told you this a long time ago and now I'm a bitch!?!?

FINE!

He's blaming me why I won't have time to train one of the teddy bear designers. He's blaming me for those people out there without jobs not having any interest whatsoever to replace me. He's blaming me for the last minute recruitment problem. He's blaming me why his world will suddenly be doomed. Awww... touching. But no... you said so many things and you turned out to be a hypocrite. It's only understandable why so many people want to leave you and the company.

BITCH! Can't you see a lot of your employees are leaving you because YOU are a hypocrite. You say I'm unprofessional? When you did not give my friend a bonus just because she's resigning from work? When it was already stated in the contract that you should give her the bonus if she completed her goals for the month? But no.. you're logic is so twisted and fucked up... she left without that PROMISED bonus. Not just promised... but AGREED UPON. He did not follow his own contract. Now who's unprofessional!?!?

Now I just can't wait to leave you and your sorry ass.

He wants his people to be efficient when he himself is not. 6 of my projects are pending. I finished them in time. But where are they?! STATUS: Waiting for validation. Who should validate? HIM. He and his bloody right-hand manager...crap. I won't even know if those projects will ever succeed. I won't even see them get published... if ever they get approved.

But he relies on me for those projects because no one else knows how to do them. Themes... videos... wallpapers... animated wallpapers... mobile flash applications... now where the fuckin hell are they? You just won't get inspired anymore if these people are not doing their job as well. You just won't get inspired to do another project (even if you just don't have a choice) because you know... at the back of your mind... you feel that these projects just won't push through.

2 of my projects that I worked on for 1 1/2 months were thrown away. Why? It turns out we don't have the license to use Cosmopolitan logo. Idiots!!!! They should have made sure that we can use the fuckin logo first. RIGHT?! Stupid....

Enough. Bad trip talaga. Sa sobrang inis ko nong day na yun, I did not send my End-of-the-Day Report, where I state what tasks I have finished for the day. Fuck! Eh wala naman ako ginawa talaga eh. Except meeting up with him... and then meeting up with my direct supervisor alone, venting on what's sooo fuckin wrong with Uma. Nagbuhusan kami ng sama ng loob namin sa isa't isa about Uma. Pano. Wala siyang kwenta!

I don't care what happens to him. I will do my part because naaawa ako don sa papalit saken. Pero sa kanya, wala nako pakialam sa kanya. Aalis ako sa end of December. And that's it. Gagawin ko ang lahat ng makakaya kong gawin para matrain ung papalit saken. After that--GOOBYE.

hehe...

2005-12-16T10:09:00.000+08:00

re layout error... sorry, i meant the new layout sana na gagamitin ko. so binalik ko toh kasi ung gagamitin ko sana... may mga images na hindi lumalabas. sowee hehehe. baka gamit na lang ako ibang layout. more Christmas-y hehe. Wuv ya guys.

under construction

2005-12-15T15:47:00.000+08:00

something's up with this layout. it's not working properly and i don't know why................. intay lang kayo. BRB.

my station

2005-12-14T16:24:00.000+08:00

awww...shaks... mamimiss ko station ko sa office.... i took this pic using N70 ata... dito sa opis yun eh... anlaki nya kumuha ng pic ah... kasinlaki ng desktop ko ung picture... pede ko na gawing wallpaper. niresize ko pa tuloy...ayan.

top (from left to right): Stitch keychain, Hero (the durug dog LOL), my doggie calendar, and Chance (bigay saken ni baby ko anjelo back from ambergris days pa...heheheh. c anj din ngpangalan sa kanya nyan kz, 'by chance' daw nya nakuha yan... ewan ko don anlabo hahaha...)

ndi nman ako mahilig sa dogs noh?! hehe. mamaya na yung christmas party namen!!! whoopeeee! wala pang 5pm eh nagaalisan na sila! aalis nako baka maiwan pako! bukas uli!!! heheh

christmas alphabet

2005-12-13T17:28:00.000+08:00

bukas na christmas party namin...dpat friday pa eh! minove dahil sa mga taga-netopia. panu..ung pinaka-bossing namin... sya may-ari ng netopia ata sa cavite (?)... eh isasabay yung mga YON sa christmas party namin. lima lang naman sila pero KAHIT NA. bakit ba? eh kami mas madami bakit kami kailangan mag-adjust for them? napa-aga tuloy.

problema...meron pa kami christmas presentation... we'll make our own spoof or parody song nung Christmas Alphabet.

last year kasi, yung ex ko (pinaka-bossing namin dito sa work -- we call him lolo or Uma kasi kamukha nya c Uma sa PinoyBB hehe...) ay namigay ng i-Pod mini. binigay nya sa ka-exchange gip nya. ABA! kaswerte ha. inggit akuuu =.(

so sa Christmas Alphabet...nilagay namin sa "I"... "I - is for the i-Pod that Sir ******* will give again" LOL. eh 10 kami per team. so bawat isa samen may line na kakantahin. saken napunta yang "I" na yan. hahaha. sana saken mapunta nga ang i-Pod video...sana yun ang ibigay nman nya this year. mayaman naman sya...kahit tinitipid nya kaming mga hamak na web designers lamang.

saklap nito lahat nung higher-ups namin na lahat foreigners eh ka-team ko. isa briton... isa indiano... isa chinese... isa french hahaha. aliw ito.

ndi ako racist ha... pero aliw kasi sila. lalo na ung indiano... pag nagsasalita sya parang nasa "under the sea" sya kasi ambilis magsalita... parang bubbles lang naririnig ko. pero sbi nya, british english sya ha. KUNO. ung briton nman...medyo manyak. so dapat conservative suot ko bukas.

first line nung kanta namin, "C - is for *(PANGALAN NG KAPATID NI LOLO na heart throb and fave ng lahat kasi tahimik at uuuuuuuber sa gwaping...pati mga lalaki nababading sa knya LOL)* who is our hottest CTO."

napunta tong line na toh dun sa chinese naming ka-team na hirap mag-ingles pa. lalaki sya ha. hahahaha. gudluck sa kanya. baka isipin ng asawa ko (kapatid ni lolo) nababading na rin sya sa kanya. last year ndi kasama asawa ko sa party eh. buti nman this year kasama sya. may pagkakataon nakong mahalikan sya. LOL. sana yun ang award pag nanalo kami as 1st place dito sa presentation namin. sila ang judges eh.. c lolo at ung asawa ko. kikindatan ko sya habang kumakanta ako hahahah. luto na toh. luto! upakan ko sya pag ndi kami nanalo. JOWK. hehehe.

bkit kaya tahimik c anj... =.( im so sad i miss him pa naman. =.( i miss him... magsalita ka by!!!!

i'm sorry...

2005-12-12T18:33:00.000+08:00

nag-away kmi ng baby ko... as in grabeh... last saturday hanggang sunday night. shet... that really scared me and stressed me out.

sunday mga 12pm ata hanggang 8pm... i turned off my cell, but before i did, i sent him a txt saying... na baka nga ndi ko sya vinavalue... coz he said i don't know how to value him... so i sed maybe he should get rid of me. then i turned off my cell...

that really made me cry...A LOT. i was so down... worried... scared.

i don't know kasi how he will react... or IF he would ever react pa...

my lola just arrived that same day... sunday afternoon yon... and yun i realized... no more tenchu kami ng baby ko =.( it's so sad to think... kasi it would just be really hard to pull off... as in... say goodbye to tenchu forever... because my lola will be staying sa haus hanggang makaalis kami for canada.

and then nag-away pa kami ni anj. i admit... i said so many hurtful things sa kanya. kasi kawawa nman c mango (bes ko). but anj was sick kaya hindi nya kami napuntahan ni bes noong friday. pero wala man lang kasi syang txt ni isa... tapos ndi pa sya nakarating. so hindi ko lam ano nangyari. so i was embarrassed. and sumabog ako and said so many harsh words kay anj the following day.

...i know he was hurt. then i realized maybe i really don't value him... he was right.

but when i turned my cell back on... bandang 8pm nong sunday... nagdatingan lahat ng txts nya... nagpanic ata... =.( i was so ashamed... so sad but happy na rin in a way na he still cared and he was also apologizing... =.( i love him so much.

buti na lang... we never ended "US". he said he was sorry... and i said kasi, how can he love someone who disrespected him and who he thinks doesn't know how to value him? and he said, he only said that (na i don't value him nga daw) out of anger daw and he was hurt kasi... buti na lang talaga... we still manage talaga to save our relationship... kahit we're really on the brink of breaking up... we still realize we can't live w/o each other. i also apologized to him ng sobra... and then he said, "let's not fight like this ever again"

he always asks me... if i love him. and then when i say i do... he says, "how much?" kasi nga naman, i love you so much diba... so by... finally, i know how much. almost all the time, i'm lost for words kasi... ndi ko lam isasagot sa tanong mo. i found this saying... sa isang libro... na ibibigay ko sayo... before i leave for canada.

This is how much I love you...

Think of something you couldn't live without...
And multiply it by a hundred.
Think of what happiness means to you
And add it to the feelings you get on the best days you've ever had.
Add up all your best feelings and take away all the rest
And what you're left with is exactly how I feel about you.
You matter more to me than you can imagine
And much more than I'll ever be able to explain.

I love you so much baby ko.

Motorola RAZR V3x

2005-12-07T15:44:00.000+08:00

Waaahh... I can't wait!!! I wanna buy this one!!!

Motorola RAZR V3x (click link below for more images of the phone...)

http://www.motorola.com/motoinfo/product/details/0,,95,00.html

SUMMARY OF FEATURES:

Sleek streamlined housing with large, vivid color external and internal displays
2 megapixel camera with 8x zoom, macro mode setting and , LED
VGA camera for 2-way video calling*
Bluetooth wireless technology* supports wireless stereo sound through Motorola's Bluetooth Stereo Headset and other compatible Bluetooth enabled accessories for hands-free communication
Up to 512 MB of removable optional TransFlash™ memory
Motorola's SCREEN3 technology solution featuring zero-click access to news, sports, entertainment, and other premium content.*
Progressive downloading to view media files on demand
Support of AAC+, MPEG4, WMV, WMA, MP3 and Real Video/Audio files
Advanced speaker-independent voice recognition: state a number/name and be connected without pre-recording
Over the air synchronization with the PC via SyncML*
WAP 2.0 browser*

The Motorola RAZR V3x is expected to be available in Q4 2005. For more information regarding pricing and product availability in your region, please contact your local Motorola representative.

hot and bored

2005-12-05T16:42:00.000+08:00

the friggin ac here in the office is not working... my flinx host suspended my account... anj is being secretive again... and i'm not doin anything again (w/c should make me happy... but i'm not happy sorry) so yeah i'm pretty darned pissed right now.

anu ba... diba?

happy birthday to mango mah bes!!! december 6 happy happy birthday bes!!!!!!!! awabshu!

i bought my own domain!!! wooopeee. but it will be activated after 24 hours pa... so... wala pa yan. i might transfer this blog over there na.... use wordpress and transfer you guys there as well.

medyo nagagamay ko na wordpress... ok nman pala sya.

i'm currently working on my personal/portfolio site... but what should i do pag activated na yung domain ko? should i keep that site... orrrr.... transfer it na rin sa domain ko mismo? waaah. i dono wat to dooo!!! =.(

eeniwee... bahala na c Lord. hahaha. ciao muna... ako ay magmumunimuni muna hahaha.

SNAP!

2005-12-01T17:17:00.000+08:00

aaaaaaagh. naiinis ako grabeh. AS INNNNNNN.

pu^%$#@!*ng babaeng un... tinetext pa rin ako hanggang ngayon! at tinawag akong bitch. yun lang ang text nya. "BITCH!" it's not that i was affected by being called a "bitch" because... honestly, it doesn't have an effect on me anymore... it's like a low blow you know? shallow. but what affects me is that she's still bothering me! me and my peaceful existence. me and my "would-this-day-get-any-worse" day (haha redundant). i already feel crappy. i feel bored. i miss anj. and now?????? KAILANGAN PA BA NYA TALAGA SABIHIN YON?

LIKE... DUH! YES I AM A BITCH. BUT YOU SAYING IT ONCE... is ok... ouch bitch daw ako. So I get over it. SAY IT TWICE... uhhh... OK FINE? SAYING IT FOR THE GAZILLIONTH TIME??? I MEAN... COME ON! GET A THESAURUS MY DEAR. WALA KA NA BA IBANG ALAM NA INSULTO?????

naiiyak ako sa sobrang pigil na pigil na emosyon. in english... i feel like crying because of pent up emotions... specifically... ANNOYANCE AND IRRITATION. get a life my dear! GET A MOVE ON ALREADY! pucha. i sooooooo wanna text her and tell her... WOULD YOU QUIT WHINING ALREADY?! I MEAN, SERIOUSLY. DON'T YOU HAVE A LIFE??? instead of making me as your venting post... SHUT UP AND REALIZE THAT THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN SAY OR DO TO CHANGE THINGS.

texting BITCH in all caps? Won't change the world honey!

JEEEEEEEZ! I swear. I can strangle someone right now. TANGINA TALAGA. sorry for the language but I'm really... REALLY REALLY REALLY PISSED OFF... nananahimik ako dito ah! Shet.

On a lighter note, nabuhay muli ang aking radio blog. My radio blog is up and running again and I've added 3 more songs.

I think that's the only good thing that happened today. Eh... whatever. Surely not enough to make me smile for days. FUCK. I feel like venting on someone tuloy... shit. I fear for anj... I might end up snapping on him. Bad.

i should be happy... but i'm not haha...

2005-11-30T17:56:00.000+08:00

pucha...petix na nman ako buong araw. sumakit ulo ko sa wala. ano ba nman yan. puro ako surf...surf... hahah sarap ng trabaho ko. binabayaran ako magsurf. di lang yun... kakakuha ko lng ng 13th month ko. hahaha. saya. ayan pede nako magresign. hehehe. tpos tpos tpos!!! kanina before lunch ata un... may nagmiskol saken... tapos nagtxt... nakita daw nya resume ko sa jobsdb at gus2 magsked ng meeting. they're currently looking for a web designer daw for their canadian based office on a project basis. isip ko... WHAAAW... canada. baka mapa-aga pa alis ko heehee... wag naman sana =.(

so meron ako mamyang phone interview sa bahay... mga 9pm. shyucks. m so nervous. mamya mautal ako nyan ah. mamya maubusan ako ng ingles. oh God... i hope both the job and the offer eh more than what i'm receiving now. kasi ngayon? parang aping-api ako. haaay. mahirap. buti na lng din may freelance project ako pero... matagal ang bayaran. ndi nman sa mukha akong pera noh. but... let's face it. sa buhay ngayon? mahirap na ang walang monetary compensation lalo na pag nagwowork ka. mahal na pamasahe. pagkain. bigas. pano ko na papakainin ang akeng anak? hahah.

anyways... sa sabado nagpapalibre pa tong c anjelo ng sine, exorcism of whoever rose or chicken little daw. hellurrr. mas gusto ko na yung feel-good movie. chicken little na lang. takte. ako pa ata ang taya sa sabado. wala na ngako ipon waaaaaaaaah. bahala na. dala na rin nya sana yung HP6 na book hehe. binilan na daw nyako eh. how chweet. i can't wait to read it.

ayan. matatapos na ang araw, don pa lang ako may ginagawa. o diba. sana kanina pa nila binigay tong tasks ko. mga leche... sakit tuloy ng ulo ko huhuhu. o sya... sa uulitin. gusto ko na umuwi't ma2log. byeee

lalala...

2005-11-29T18:43:00.000+08:00

hahah...ay grabeh... wala ako magawa. i have to finish a sub-page layout design for a web project na bigatin... mala neimanmarcus.com. hanggang ngayon... ndi ako makagalaw... so pano ba yan!?

but i finally finished the 'If I Ain't Got You (Remix)' fanlisting na in-adopt ko from Anne... soo soooo happy na binigay nya saken yung fanlisting. ayows ba ang akeng priorities??? hahah.

so ayun... sana join kayo don sa aking fanlisting (check out the 'Support') link sa left... and then kung fan kayo... JOIN NAMAN KAYO. WAG NANG MAHIYA. ANG MAHIYA PANGET. aheehee.

sige... madami pako gagawin. sino nanonood ng Jamie Oliver's School Dinners sa Discovery Channel - Travel & Living? Grabeh. ALIW SYA. PRAMIS. Every Tuesday sya, 9pm ata o 10pm. Shaks. Ndi pako sure. Basta kasabay sya ng The Apprentice: Martha Stewars sa ABC 5. if you get a chance to watch it... ay grabeh panoorin nyo. ang cute ng baby ni Jamie!!! si Poppy. heehee. mukha talagang Poppy. sarap kurutin.

oi.....*sigh*... katamad talaga. i was absent nga from work today eh. ndi ko pa rin maintindihan pakiramdam ko. sana... bumalik na yung normal feeling ko ba. hay nako. shaks pasko na guys...... MADAMI NA NAMANG PAGKAIN!!! hahahaha. speaking of pagkain... parang gutom nako... so i'll eat na. malapit na yung wordpress site ko na maayos!!! wooopee. lagi ko na lang sinasabi ata na malapit na... malapit na... pero parang walang nangyayari. hahaha. mag-iipon pako rin ng tutorials and works eh. as i was learning how to use wordpress... madami rin ako nadidiscover na solusyon sa mga problema... so i'll post those up. ok ok... madami na toh... i'll eat na. byee mwah! advance merry christmas to all!

revamp

2005-11-28T17:39:00.000+08:00

i'm back... and i've fixed the sidebar...masyado kasing cluttered... mas aayusin ko pa yan...ngunit subalit datapwat... ako'y pagod na...

saturday and sunday i was sick. damn. must be the food that i ate at minggoy's. sobrang rich. may mushrooms in garlic (BIG mushrooms), may paella... may prawns in curry sauce... mahilo-hilo ako sa sarap. ayun... sabado... cguro don pa lang umepekto. ok i won't go into details kung anu exactly nangyari saken... hehehe.

friday and saturdaY... walang text galeng kay anj. aba... record-breaker. longest ever na ndi sya ngparamdam saken. nakamfotah. asar na asar ako. so ayun hanggang ngayon nagtatampo pako sa kanya. pero thursday or friday daw magkikita kami. kasi... malapit na dumating lola ko. sa december 4 na yun. so... malapit na rin na 'say goodbye to tenchu' kami... forever. how sad.

petix ako ngayon sa opis. sa sobrang petix... buong araw... inaral ko wordpress... plug-ins... and all the chuvaness. hayun... so far... may naintindihan naman ako. pero bago ko ilipat ang buong blog ko don, sisiguraduhin ko muna na maayos na maayos na yung site ko don sa kabila... at gamay nako ng sobra at wala na talaga ako ginagawa.

shyet. antagal ng december 27. i will finally submit my resignation letter. waaaaaaah. can't wait.

ano pa ba sasabihin ko...........ho-hum.................wala na. bukas na uleh...goobye! mwah!

new domain name

2005-11-24T11:15:00.000+08:00

guyyyyyyys... you can change your bookmark/url to this blogsite:

http://www.friiiky.co.nr/

Para ndi nman masyado mahaba noh.

YEYYYY! Mas maikli na......BTW, malapit na malapit nako mag-WordPress. Tinetesting ko lang muna sa ibang site. Pag gamay nako...I'm going to transfer there naaaaaaa!!! Woopee.

so me...

2005-11-22T21:59:00.000+08:00

I just found this site that will analyze your name... and when I read mine... it's like... that's SOOO ME.

Oh and yeah...my first REAL name is actually Corinne. But I also tried Nikki and it's still SOOO ME.

Your name of Corinne gives you the desire to understand and to help others but, at the same time you can become too involved in their problems and, as a result, worry too much. You desire a home and family of your own and have the ability to create understanding and harmony in family association as you are pliable, forgiving, and tactful. You love children and would not hesitate to care for any children who might need you. Whenever possible, you avoid argument and turmoil because you prefer not to face an issue if it means hurting anyone's feelings.

Although the name Corinne creates the urge to work in harmony with others, we point out that it causes a superior, interfering expression. This name, when combined with the last name, can frustrate happiness, contentment, and success, as well as cause health weaknesses in the fluid systems, worry and mental tension.

------------------------------------

The name of Nikki makes you very idealistic, sensitive, and inspirational. If these qualities are not understood and properly directed through music, art, or other creative expression, you could become jealous and possessive of those close to you. Your feelings are so strong that you are inclined to build your life around certain individuals and become wrapped up in personal love rather than seeking into the deeper truths of life; thus you could suffer losses in your affections and shattered ideals. You are generous and people are drawn to you because of your friendly and sympathetic nature.

Although the name Nikki creates idealism and the urge to help others, we emphasize that it causes an emotional intensity that is hard to control. This name, when combined with the last name, can frustrate happiness, contentment, and happiness, as well as cause health weaknesses in the nervous system.

chillout

2005-11-22T10:43:00.000+08:00

I'm really contemplating on buying AT LEAST one CD from The Chillout Project compilations before Christmas. Shockingly, just recently, my baby was also requesting for Chillout CDs... hmm... bigyan ko din kaya sya. Hahaha as if I'm rich noh. I can't even buy a new pair of sneakers for myself... how patitik.

Speaking of CDs...my sister's bday is on thurs (as well as Bessie's--happy birthday!!!). I still don't know what kind of gift I should buy... She likes chillout as well... maybe I can buy her the CD... besides, when it comes to CDs... whatever's mine... is hers (sorta), and vice versa. So technically, the chillout CD would be mine as well... bwahahaha. Even if she won't lend me the CD I can just rip it right? Sus...napakadali. Ayos na.

Aaaagh I hate my radioblog host!!! Palibhasa libre kasi... pucha.

Good news muna...my headache's gone...hopefully it won't come back... and I will move on to WordPress na so I can insert smilies into my blog. Hirap rin ah...kung manual kong sinisingit yun... tagal nakong bumubuwelo gamitin wordpress... now hindi ko na kayaaa!!! Waaahh. WordPress na talaga ako. Malapit na...para magamit ko rin yung HP4 na layout na btw, ndi ko pa natatapos. So ineehow... I will be back again... I will share my concert experience w/ Constantine... and my thoughts re Harry Potter 4. Harry forever pa rin ako....he looks dashing as always. Hahaha.

So ciao muna... madami akong trabaho heehee. How I wish nakikinig nako ng chillout..para meju kumalma ako noh...mamya sumakit na nman ulo ko wawa nman me =.(

continue tomorrow...

2005-11-21T17:39:00.000+08:00

finally! i'm doing something...i didn't realize that it was already 5:30pm! i am still bored though...actually...bored AND sleepy. but at least i did something productive.

i have so many things to share... Harry Potter 4 (w/c I watched twice heehee)... Constantine...

OMG Constantine is sooo delicious. yummables as my baby would say...hahaha.

I would be posting some videos of him performing...i just hope the videos would look much better here than thru my sister's fone... *blech*... I swear, we should've brought the digicam instead... hay nako.

anyway, i gotta run......maybe tomorrow i'll start to blog more...........my head hurts like hell...

i miss mama...i want to eat...i want white flower for my headache and i want to sleep. so ciao! hehehe...

mwah! (happy 21 to me n mah baby nga pala!!!!! awabshu mwah!)

ilang oras na lang...wahahaha

2005-11-17T11:04:00.000+08:00

so 2loy nga kmi later... pero problema mga 8 or 830 pa kami magkikita...
nag-OT sya sa work, night shift na nga...dahil sa call center... pupunta pa clark dahil may counseling sya... (siya yung may ika-counseling...)
ma22log.... at pupunta pa d2 sa las piñas...
wawa nman baby ko... pagud-paguran... sbi ko sa knya pano na sya nyan mamya... grabeh kasi... puro sya byahe...
sbi nya sleep na lng sya pag nagtenchu kmi... so... cge... pano kaya yun??? talaga bang ma22log sya o pakuning na nman nya yan.... hay nako... pero at least makakatenchu pa rin..
im so excited to watch harry potter na...... pucha... mamaya na nga yun eh pero parang antagal parin...
last tym i saw him was november 1 pa... tenchu tym pa yun ah... so mabilis lang yun eh... =.( fuck naman...
buti this time i'll get 2 see his face dahil may ilaw na and all..and makakausap ko na sya....
sana lang talaga walang mangyari na maudlot pa ito...kundi iiyak talaga ako......

cross mah fingers...

2005-11-16T21:59:00.000+08:00

so....our miting was supposed to be on saturday...then it was moved on friday... BUT... Constantine Maroulis will be in ATC on friday night so me and my mom, sis, and my dad (who'll follow us MAYBE after the show na coz he really doesnt give a damn abt Constantine...or who he really is...) will watch the show... (i don't even know what kind of show that is... interview? concert? what? who knows... and frankly i don't care...i love constantine)...

so yeah...BUKAS NA...i'll meet him tomorrow na...and i'm so psyched. but he just txted me asking what time kaya ang LFS sa cinema...and i inquired thru myGlobe from my fone and saw that LFS for harry potter in atc starts at 9pm, the other cinema starts the movie at 930, another at 10... pati SM Southmall ganon din....sobrang late...but hey i don't really give a damn. but 2morow and friday...off nya sa work... but he told me has to "schedule" his off... so he's scheduling his off tomorrow............fuck...*cross fingers*...

i told him pag hindi natuloy meeting nmin...i will cry (and throw a big tantrum... I SWEAR). hahaha.

well anyway...gosh super late nung LFS ano oras na kaya ako makakauwi....but as long as i'm with mah baby and i'm watching Harry Potter.....dayum......(kikay version for 'damn')... who cares.....it'll be worth the 'puyat' or watever....kung pwede nga lang wag na umuwi eh... hahaha.

ay but......that's the good part nga pala....hahaha...uuwi nga pala kmi....haha tenchu na naman ito. tenchu na naman tyo by! hahaha...but uhmm...makakatenchu pa nga ba tyo??? ano kaya sked non... =.( naman eh... =(

clean look naman...

2005-11-16T14:38:00.000+08:00

haaaaaaay...finally changed my layout...ibabalik ko pa rin c jd next tym....but the old layout looked sooo cramped ba...

i needed a fresh new look...so here it is finally.......mas maayos nman ngayon...

i'm workin on a new Harry Potter 4 layout......that should be up later this month...gawin ko na rin medyo 'Christmas' theme para 2 in 1 na.....

i miss mah baby...bati na kmi heeheeeeee...pero tampo p rin ako ng konti sa knya pero he'll meet me this fridayyyyyy waaahh...

so psyched...grabeh.

warning to bloggers

2005-11-16T10:57:00.000+08:00

A warning for bloggers....scaaaywee... =.(

http://www.livejournal.com/users/anniesj/331112.html

20 Questions...

2005-11-15T13:33:00.000+08:00

LOOOOOONG....but a nice read... (forwarded by a friend of mine...)

This play won in the palanca awards, dulaang isang yugto category (daw).

Twenty Questions
Ni Juan Ekis

MGA TAUHAN

Jigs - Fresh grad. Kabarkada ni Yumi. Magtatrabaho bilang researcher sa isang financial firm

Yumi - Commercial Model. Kabarkada ni Jigs. 2 years ahead kay Jigs.

TAGPO

Gabi. Sa isang kwarto ng isang beach resort. Naglalatag ng kumot si Jigs sa sahig habang inaayos ni Yumi ang kanyang higaan.

YUMI - Sige na, Jigs. Huwag ka nang magpaka-gentle man. Naaawa ako sa'yo e. Tabi na tayo sa kama.

JIGS - Hindi, okay lang ako dito.

YUMI - Huwag ka nang maarte. As if naman re-rapin kita no. Malaki naman itong kama e. Hatiin na lang natin sa gitna.

JIGS - Sure ka?

YUMI - Hindi mo naman siguro ako mamanyakin no?

JIGS - (Matatawa) Okay ka lang?

YUMI - Kung gusto mo, gamitin na lang natin iyang kumot na divider.

JIGS - Good idea.

Isasampay nila ang kumot mula sa kisame para mahati ang kama sa gitna.

Magsesettle down ang dalawa. Ilalabas ni Jigs ang libro niya: Puppy Love and other Stories ni F. Sionil Jose. Si Yumi naman ay magpapatugtog ng Japanese Zen Music habang nagsa-zazen.

YUMI - Do you mind?

JIGS - No, go ahead. I'm just reading.

Magsa-zazen si Yumi. Magbabasa si Jigs. Pareho silang di maka-concentrate. Papatayin ni Yumi ang CD player niya.

YUMI - I can't believe our friends.

JIGS - Oo nga e.

YUMI - Dapat ginagawa nila 'to sa mga bagong pasok sa barkada o kaya sa bagong...ay oo nga pala. Bagong graduate ka. Congrats.

JIGS - Thanks.

YUMI - So what're your plans?

JIGS - Kinukuha akong researcher sa ADB. Kinukuha rin ako ng BPI sa OTP nila.

YUMI - Wow naman. In demand.

JIGS - Di naman masyado. Who the hell invented this tradition anyway?

YUMI - (Matatawa) You won't believe it.

JIGS - Ikaw?

YUMI - Malay ko ba na mabibiktima rin ako nito balang-araw.

JIGS - So why did you start it?

YUMI - Wala ka pa sa tropa nun e. Freshman ka pa lang siguro noon. Wala lang. Napagtripan lang namin si Ronald. E may crush siya kay Meg. Noong unang beses magpunta rito ng barkada, sabi ko, magsimula kami ng tradition. Ilo-lottery namin ang pangalan ng mga lalaki at ng mga babae. Kung sino ang mabubunot, silang dalawa ang pagsasamahin sa isang kwarto sa loob ng tatlong araw. And then, we'll all see what happens. Pero dinaya namin noon yung kay Ronald at Meg. Puro Ronald at Meg ang mga pangalan na nakalagay sa lottery.

JIGS - (Tatawa) Ang sama ninyo!

YUMI - Kaya nga nakarma na ako e.

JIGS - So is our case, dinaya? O talagang lottery?

YUMI - (Teasing) Ano sa dalawa ang gusto mo?

JIGS - Feeling ko may nagtrip sa'kin sa barkada e.

YUMI - Excuse me po, dalawa tayong biktima dito. I don't see any reason kung bakit tayong dalawa ang sasadyaing biktima this year, unless may crush ka sa'kin na di ko alam at alam nila (tatawa).

JIGS - Baka ikaw (tatawa).

YUMI - The success rate of this tradition is 100% so far.

JIGS - I was here na the 2nd time. Si Chris at si Cia ang biktima.

YUMI - And last year were Rod and Kay. They're getting married kailan? Sa June yata.

JIGS - What do you expect? Ikukulong mo ang isang lalaki at isang babae sa isang kwarto for three days, imposibleng walang mangyari doon!

YUMI - That was exactly my point. (Ngingiti)

JIGS - E kung may madisgrasya?

YUMI - Ano'ng disgrasya?

JIGS - Alam mo na ?yun!

Hahawiin ni Yumi ang divider nilang kumot.

YUMI - Ano? Sex? Pa'no kung magsex sila? Nakakatawa ka naman. Di mo masabi.

JIGS - Ang alin?

YUMI - Ang sex!

JIGS - Hah!

YUMI - Sige nga sabihin mo nga?

JIGS - Para kang tanga. Tumigil ka nga.

YUMI - Shet, Jigs. Graduate ka na totoy ka pa rin!

JIGS - Excuse me?

YUMI - Sabihin mo nga: "Sex! Sex! Sex! Sex!"

JIGS - Para kang bata, Yumi ha.

YUMI - You used to call me ate Yumi when you were in third year.

JIGS - Well, graduate na po ako, ate Yumi.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Hmmm. I wonder if we're gonna last three days.

YUMI - (Teasing) Bakit? Ayaw mo sa'kin?

Di sasagot si Jigs.

YUMI - We're gonna survive this one.

JIGS - What makes you so sure?

YUMI - No offense, Jigs. I honestly find you very attractive pero I've no time for this. Alam mo naman siguro na kaka'

JIGS - Same here.

YUMI - Same here what? Na you find me attractive o you don't have time for this? (Matatawa)

Di sasagot si Jigs. Tahimik. Io-on ulit ni Yumi ang CD player at ipagpapatuloy ang zazen. Itatabi ni Jigs ang libro. Nawalan na siya ng ganang magbasa. Pupunta siya sa ref. Bubuksan niya ito.

JIGS - Hah! (Sarcastic) Perfect! Red Wine! How very conducive.

YUMI - May chips ba diyan?

JIGS - Sa awa ng Diyos, may tsibog naman.

Papatayin ni Yumi ang CD player. Tatayo siya at kukuha ng chips sa ibabaw ng ref.

YUMI - Since we're gonna be stuck naman with each other for three days, might as well make the best out of it di ba? I-enjoy na lang natin.

JIGS - What do you mean?

YUMI - Get the wine, let's have a drink! 50 hours to go na lang and we're gonna be the first failure of this tradition.

JIGS - Oo nga. (Kukunin ang wine. Maglalagay sa dalawang baso.) When they chose Cia and Chris, naiintindihan ko pa e. Lalo na sina Rod and Kay. Kung baga, tinulungan lang natin silang umamin sa isa't isa. Pero us...

YUMI - Weird ng barkada natin no?

JIGS - To our barkada and our weird traditions!

YUMI - To us, the first failure of this tradition!

Magto-toast sila at iinom.

JIGS - Sige, ate Yumi. Let's make our stay here more interesting...

YUMI - What's with the ate?

JIGS - Fine...

Bubuksan ni Yumi ang chips. Uupo sila pareho sa sahig para magkwentuhan.

JIGS - Let's play twenty questions.

YUMI - Sige! Ano yon?

JIGS - Each of us will have ten questions each. Tatanungin kita, tatanungin mo ako, mga gusto nating malaman sa isa't isa. Alternate tayo. Pero the thing here is, you can't ask the question that I already asked.

YUMI - That's pretty interesting.

JIGS - At bawal magsinungaling.

YUMI - Fair enough. Pero whatever is said inside this room remains in the room. Ok?

JIGS - Of course. You wanna start?

YUMI - No. I want to ask the last question. (Ngingiti at kikindatan si Jigs)

JIGS - Smart move. Game. First question: Ano ang greatest frustration mo sa buhay?

YUMI - Nge. Ang korni naman ng tanong mo. Walang ka-challenge-challenge. Ask me something na mag-iisip naman ako.

JIGS - Simula pa lang e.

YUMI - Sige. Ano nga ba...?

JIGS - Akala ko ba walang ka-challenge-challenge?

YUMI - Wag kang maingay, nag-iisip ako...I'm a frustrated ballet dancer.

JIGS - Talaga?

YUMI - I took lessons when I was six pero umayaw ako. Wala kasi akong disiplina e. Mas gusto kong makipaglaro sa mga kalaro ko. Pero I really enjoy watching ballet dancers. When I see them dance parati kong naiisip na sana, ako rin. There! Ang dali naman ng tanong mo. Walang thrill.

JIGS - Appetizer lang. Yari ka sa'kin mamaya.

YUMI - We'll see. Ako naman: Did you ever have doubts about your sexuality? I mean, kahit minsan ba, naisip mo na bakla ka?

JIGS - Never.

YUMI - Bilis ng sagot a.

JIGS - Coz I never entertained the idea.

YUMI - Homophobe ka ba?

JIGS - Alternate tayo sa tanungan, di ba?

YUMI - So, not once? Kahit konti? Kahit what if lang?

JIGS - I'm straight, okay?

YUMI - I'm not asking if you're gay or not. I'm asking kung...

JIGS - Never nga.

YUMI - We all thought na you were gay. Well at least nung first few months mo sa tropa before you introduced your girlfriend to us.

JIGS - What?! You thought I was gay?!

YUMI - E pa'no kasi, masyado kang mabait. Ang pogi-pogi mo, pero parang allergic ka sa mga babae. Over ang pagiging gentleman mo. Too good to be true. You have a good body, it seems that you work out pero iniisip namin front mo lang yun. Kadalasan kasi front ng mga bakla ang pagiging maganda ng katawan nila at pagiging sporty...

Tatawa lang si Jigs.

YUMI - So we thought it's either that or you were planning to become a priest.

JIGS - What?!

YUMI - Well, you were always this goody-goody person. Pumupunta ka sa chapel. Nangungumpisal, nagsisimba...

JIGS - The way you said it, parang equivalent ang dalawa a.

YUMI - Of course not. I didn't mean that!

JIGS - I take my faith seriously. That doesn't make me gay!

YUMI - So you did want to become a priest...

JIGS - Hindi rin. Actually, I always wanted to raise a family...and be a father.

Tahimik.

YUMI - So you're not gay.

JIGS - No.

YUMI - You never...

JIGS - Ilang beses ka ba ipinanganak? Kulit mo e. It's my turn.

YUMI - Homophobe ka no?

JIGS - Hindi kaya!

YUMI - Whatever...

JIGS - Ako na, daya mo naman e.

YUMI - Okay, okay. Shoot me.

JIGS - How do you see yourself five years from now?

YUMI - You expect to win this game? Ang kokorni ng mga tanong mo e.

JIGS - The object of this game is not to win.

YUMI - E ano pa ba?

JIGS - To get to know the other person.

YUMI - Sure. Basta ako, I will win this game. Walang thrill ang isang game kung walang nananalo.

JIGS - Sagot.

YUMI - May time limit ba to? (Tatawa) Wine pa nga.

JIGS - Sabi nga nila: in vino veritas.

Magsasalin si Jigs ng wine.

YUMI - Masarap ang wine, ha? Saan kaya nabili ito? (Iinom) To answer your question, either maging entrepreneur ako, magsisimula ako ng sarili kong botique or bar, o kaya, magiging artista ako sa pelikula.

JIGS - Not bad.

YUMI - Pero mukhang malabo yung stint ko sa movies. Tough ang competition e. Saka mahina ang manager ko. Panay hosting at pictorials ang nakukuhang raket para sa akin. Papalitan ko na nga e. Pag nakaipon ako, baka magtayo na lang ako ng botique.

JIGS - (Magbibiro) Ayaw mo mag-bold?

YUMI - Yuck!

JIGS - Lahat ng gustong mag-artista doon dumadaan.

YUMI - May talent naman ako kahit papano a!

JIGS - Lahat naman ng bold star may talent a! Sa dibdib! (Tatawa)

YUMI - (Hahampasin ng unan si Jigs) Bastos ka talaga! Akala ko goody-goody ka...Hindi ko papatulan ang pagbobold kahit ano'ng mangyari no! Kahit ganito ako, may respeto pa rin naman ako sa sarili ko.

JIGS - Ganito? Ano'ng ganito?

Di sasagutin ni Yumi ang tanong.

YUMI - These producers think all the people want is sex, sex, sex! Kaya puro basura ang mga pelikula e. Wine pa nga!

JIGS - (Magsasalin ng wine) Bakit naman botique?

YUMI - Hoy madaya ka na ha? Hindi pa ako lasing. Ako na'ng magtatanong. Ang korni mo namang magtanong. Bigatan naman natin nang konti...Inom ka muna.

Iinom si Jigs. Magsasalin siya ng bago.

YUMI - Who was your first crush in the barkada?

Tahimik.

YUMI - Haha! Bingo ka no? Bagal mo naman sumagot.

Iinumin ang wine. Magsasalin ng bago.

JIGS - Lalaki o babae?

Tatawa sila pareho.

YUMI - Dapat may time limit ito e.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Hirap naman ng tanong mo.

YUMI - Iyon nga ang maganda e. Para may thrill. As if naman ibo-broadcast ko sa barkada kung sino.

JIGS - Wine pa?

YUMI - Di mo pa sinasagot yung tanong ko, nagtatanong ka na!

Magsasalin ng wine si Jigs kay Yumi.

JIGS - Yung crush ko kasi...siyempre, sino pa ba? E di yung pinakamaganda sa barkada.

YUMI - Nge. Subjective yon no! Para sa'kin ang pinakagwapo si Joel. Sa babae, si Kay. Para kay Ronald, si Meg...

JIGS - Yung literally na may dating'walang tanung-tanong. Yung kahit sino'ng tanungin mo sa tropa, objectively, siya ang isasagot.

YUMI - Jigs, twenty questions ang game natin. Hindi guessing game. C'mon man. Play your own game. Pa'no na kung truth or dare to e di pahirapan na. Dadalawa na nga lang tayo e.

JIGS - Yung commercial model.

Matitigilan si Yumi.

YUMI - Wine pa nga.

Magsasalin si Jigs. Mag-iisip si Yumi. Iinom. Biglang matatawa.

YUMI - (Tumatawa pa rin) Talaga?

JIGS - Sige, pagtawanan ba?

YUMI - You can say it to my face, I won't bite. Bakit hirap na hirap kang sabihin kung sino? Takot kang ma-reject? Parang tanong lang e...Wine pa nga!

JIGS - Okay, 1 point ka na...

YUMI - (Ngiti) Gee...thanks. Flattered naman ako. At kailan naman nangyari ito?

JIGS - Sorry, my turn to ask. (Ngingiti) Who is your crush in the barkada...NOW?

YUMI - E ginaya mo lang yung tanong ko e.

JIGS - Hinde no. May qualifier ako. Ang sabi ko, NOW. Ang tanong mo, first crush ko.

YUMI - Korni pa rin. Alam mo, kung basketball 'to, tambak ka na.

JIGS - Just answer the question.

YUMI - Siyempre wala. I told you, I don't have time for these stuff. Kakabreak ko lang di ba?

JIGS - Korni mo namang sumagot.

YUMI - E korni yung tanong e. Pero kung talagang-talagang kailangan kong sumagot...hmmm...teka...sino nga ba? Sino ba'ng crush material sa barkada? Wala akong maisip e. Ikaw na lang.

JIGS - Yung seryoso naman.

YUMI - Seryoso ako. Ayaw mo yata e. Sige, iba na lang...

JIGS - E napipilitan ka lang e.

YUMI - Uy! Pa'no ba 'yan? MU na tayo? Crush mo ko, crush kita...yiheee

(Tatawa).

JIGS - Dati pa 'yon no!

YUMI - Ay? Di mo na ko crush? Bakit, na turn-off ka? Ano namang ginawa ko? Tsk. Tsk.

JIGS - Is that your question na?

YUMI - Oy, hinde! Ito naman...di ba pwedeng mag-follow-up?

Iinom ng wine si Jigs.

YUMI - Fine. Here's a little juicy question: Describe your first kiss.

JIGS - That's not even a question.

YUMI - Arte mo. O: How was your first kiss like?

Matatawa si Jigs.

JIGS - Wet.

YUMI - Yuck!

Magtatawanan sila.

JIGS - Alam mo, aksidente yung first kiss ko. Close kasi kami nung isa kong kaibigan. Pag naggu-goodbye ako sa kanya, parati ko siyang kini-kiss sa noo. E one time, sa gym habang nagpapahinga, nakaupo siya sa sahig. Tinatamad siyang tumayo. So bumaba ako nang konti para halikan siya sa noo kasi pauwi na ako. E siya naman, para maabot ko, medyo tumingala. E sakto, sa lips ko siya nahalikan. Pareho kaming nagulat. Pero di pa kami naghiwalay agad. Weird nga ang feeling e. Parang may glue. Ayaw na namin maghiwalay pareho...

Tawa pa rin si Yumi

YUMI - Awww. Ang sweet naman. Parang sa pelikula. Si Krissy ba to?

JIGS - Hindi. Hindi mo siya kilala.

YUMI - So what happened? Nagkatuluyan kayo?

JIGS - Nope.

YUMI - Ha?

JIGS - Ewan ko ba. Complicated kasi yung situation namin e. May boyfriend siya noon. Ako naman, takot pa sa isang relationship. Pero at least, na-discover namin na pareho pala kaming may gusto sa isa't isa. Pero hanggang doon na lang.

YUMI - What happened after?

JIGS - We talked about it. We both decided na it wont work. Tapos, bigla na lang, hindi na kami nagkikita. And then, I met you guys, iba na ang barkada ko.

YUMI - Nakakatuwa naman.

JIGS - Ikaw, pa'no yung first kiss mo?

YUMI - Ikaw ang nagturo sa akin ng game na ito di ba? Bakit ba lagi mong bini-break ang rules? Di mo na pwedeng tanungin 'yan!

JIGS - Tine-testing ko lang kung lasing ka na. (Iinom ng wine)
Okay, naka-warm-up na ako: What was the naughtiest thing you ever did?

YUMI - ?Yan ang mga tanong! Ano ba'ng ibig mong sabihin ng naughty?

JIGS - Bahala kang mag-define.

YUMI - Hmmm...marami e...(matatawa) baka maeskandalo ka.

JIGS - Kanina ayaw mo ng korni. Ngayong medyo exciting naman...

YUMI - Eto na...I had two boyfriends at the same time.

JIGS - (Nagulat) Hala.

YUMI - I was with Joel and Zach at the same time.

JIGS - Yikes. Alam ba ni Joel?

YUMI - Kaya nga kami naghiwalay nun e. Nahuli ako (matatawa).

JIGS - Ano namang pumasok sa kukote mo't ginawa mo 'yon, aber?

YUMI - Nag-eexperiment lang ako. E sa type ko sila pareho e. Ano'ng magagawa ko? Saka para may thrill. Alam mo 'yon? Yung patago kang nakikipag-date sa isa para di mahuli. Everyday pa akong nakakalibre, kasi, alternate sila! (Tatawa) Akala n'yo kayo lang mga lalaki ang pwedeng gumawa no'n?

JIGS - How can you love two guys at the same time?

YUMI - Who said something about love? Walang kinalaman ang love dun. I was...having fun!

JIGS - Nainlove ka na ba, ever?

YUMI - Nakakailang tanong ka na? It's my turn.

JIGS - Don't you want to answer the question anyway?

YUMI - My turn!

JIGS - Kulang ka pa sa wine. (Tatawa)

Ubos na ang unang wine bottle. Kukuha si Jigs ng isa pa sa ref.

JIGS - Ang bilis nating uminom a.

YUMI - Are you still a virgin?

JIGS - Whoa! Where did that come from?

YUMI - That's my fourth question.

JIGS - (Magsasalin ng wine sa mga baso). Ano sa tingin mo?

Ngingiti si Jigs. Tititigan lang siya ni Yumi.

YUMI - Don't tell me, wala pang nangyayari sa inyo ni Krissy hanggang ngayon? Ilang taon na ba kayo?

JIGS - Mag-tu-two years na sana next week.

YUMI - So virgin ka pa? I don't believe it!

JIGS - Mukha ba akong tarantado?

YUMI - Mukha kang nagpapaiyak ng babae e.

JIGS - Insulto ba 'yon?

YUMI - Compliment 'yon, tanga.

JIGS - Ah, okay. Thanks.

YUMI - Pero, you mean, you never felt the urge to do it?

JIGS - Alin? Sex?

YUMI - Wow! Nasabi rin niya!

JIGS - Of course I always feel it. Natural lang 'yon sa tao no? Nasa iyo na lang 'yan kung ano'ng gagawin mo sa urge na 'yon.

YUMI - E natural naman pala e. Bakit mo pinipigilan? I mean, pag naiihi ka, iihi ka. Pag nagugutom ka, kakain ka. Pareho lang 'yon, di ba?

JIGS - Pag naiihi ka, iihi ka dahil kailangan mong umihi. At hindi ka iihi kahit saan. Pupunta ka sa banyo. Pag nagugutom ka, kakain ka dahil kailangan. At hindi mo kinakain ang lahat ng pagkain na ihain sa iyo. Pag di ka gutom, di ka kakain. Pag di mo gusto yung pagkain, di mo gagalawin. Ang aso, pag may nakitang pagkain diyan, walang tanung-tanong. Lalamon 'yan.

YUMI - And sex is the same?

JIGS - Lahat ng bagay, nilalagay sa lugar. May context. At least, yun ang nagpaiba sa atin sa aso.

YUMI - Grabe ka namang magsalita. Para mo na ring sinabing lahat ng nakikipagsex, aso ah!

JIGS - Sinasabi ko lang, pag wala sa tamang konteksto, mali.

YUMI - And what is that context?

JIGS - Matanda na tayo. Ayokong maging preachy. Alam na natin yan.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Kaso, kahit alam na natin, minsan di pa rin natin ginagawa.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Masarap e. Sino ba'ng ayaw nun?

Tahimik.

YUMI - (Medyo nairita) So feeling mo santo ka at dapat kang i-congratulate for being a virgin!

JIGS - Sinasabi ko lang ang pinaniniwalaan ko. Ineexplain ko lang kung bakit di ko ginagawa. May kanya-kanya tayong dahilan. Di ko pinipilit kahit kanino ang mga paniniwala ko...No need to get so cross about it, Yumi.

Tahimik.

JIGS - It's not about being a virgin or not. It's about putting things into their proper places.

YUMI - I'm not arguing with you.

JIGS - Me neither. I'm just answering your questions.

Matagal na katahimikan.

Ngingiti si Jigs. Titignan niya si Yumi na medyo nairita sa nakaraang train of conversation nila. Magsasalin siya ng wine para kay Yumi.

JIGS - Nasobrahan ka na yata sa wine e. (Tatawa) You still wanna go on with the game? Nine pa lang tayo, eleven more to go. (Ngingiti)

YUMI - Shoot me.

JIGS - Who was your first lay?

YUMI - (Hahampasin ng unan si Jigs) Ang bastos mo talaga! So inaassume mo na hindi na ako virgin?

JIGS - E sabi mo kasi, walang thrill ang game pag walang nananalo e. So I guess I'm winning. Saka wala naman akong inimply na ganun a! I'm just hitting two birds with one stone. Kasi kung virgin ka, e di simple lang ang sagot: wala. Kung hindi naman, e di sino?

YUMI - Ang daya mo.

JIGS - Akala ko ba ayaw mo ng korning tanong.

YUMI - You think I'll answer that after giving your sermon, Father Jigs?

JIGS - Ano ka ba? Inexplain ko lang yung personal reasons ko. Kung ano man ang sa iyo, I'll respect them as well as I know you respect mine. I'm no saint. I'm just trying to get to know you better. (Ngingiti)

YUMI - How do you do that?

JIGS - Alin?

YUMI - I should have walked out on you kanina pa pero the way you say things...parang bumabaliktad sa'yo...makes you more...charming. Kung ibang tao ka siguro, di na kita kakausapin.

JIGS - You can't walk out. We're locked here for three days except for meals.

YUMI - So I'm forced to like you para di masira ang vacation ko.
(Ngingiti)

JIGS - You don't have to answer my question if you don't want.

YUMI - I guess I'll be honest with you as you were honest with me...

Tahimik. Iinom ng wine si Yumi.

YUMI - Di mo siya kilala. His name was Robert. He was my first boyfriend. It was Senior Prom Night. Alam mo na...typical senior prom story. Everyone wants to lose it on prom night. Everyone thinks na pag prom night, it was something special. We went out sa hall nang maaga. We made out sa kotse niya. One thing led to the other. Tapos, yun...yun na. We went back just in time for the awarding of the prom queen. Guess what, I won pa. (Mahinang tawa)

JIGS - What was it like?

YUMI - Now that I look back, it isn't as special as I thought it was. Pero it was different then. Back then, we were just led by our passions. Alam mo yon? Andun ka na. Hormones raging wild. Passions and ideals are confused. Akala mo love, yun pala, curious ka lang pala. Akala mo yun na yon. Akala mo you are in-love at lahat ng gawin mo tama. Lahat ng gawin mo perfect. Everything was magical...well, almost.

JIGS - Almost...?

YUMI - Sa next question mo na 'yan. Ako na.

JIGS - (Pabiro) Wine pa? Kulang ka pa yata e.

YUMI - Nilalasing mo ko no? May balak ka sa'kin no? (Tatawa)

JIGS - Is that your question? Sasagutin ko na. (Tatawa)

YUMI - Engot. Hindi 'yon. Here's something na curious lang ako. Kasi I've been hearing things...saka you've hinted on it na rin kanina...Are you still with Krissy?

JIGS - Hindi na.

YUMI - Since when?

JIGS - Two, maybe three weeks ago?

YUMI - Sino'ng nakipag-break?

JIGS - Pareho kami.

YUMI - Why?

JIGS - Maraming dahilan, actually. Naisip na lang namin na it won't work. Isa na do'n, magkaiba kami ng gustong mangyari sa buhay. Magkaiba kami ng mga pinaniniwalaan.

YUMI - Like what?

JIGS - Marami.

YUMI - At ngayon mo lang nalaman iyon after two years with her?

JIGS - People change, Yumi.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Right before graduation, she asked me to move in with her.

YUMI - Talaga?

JIGS - Sabi niya, doon na naman din daw papunta ang relasyon namin. Might as well practice na raw for the real thing. Tutal, she's working na naman, ako naman bagong graduate, we should try out na raw living together if it'll work for us.

YUMI - Natakot ka sa arrangement?

JIGS - Hindi naman sa natakot. If you love someone, ano pa'ng ikakatakot mo, di ba?

YUMI - E bakit umayaw ka?

JIGS - It's just that, it's not my thing.

YUMI - Sabi na nga ba e, bakla ka no? Sinasayang mo ang opportunities!
(Matatawa)

JIGS - Hindi ako oportunista. At lalong hindi ako bakla.

YUMI - Fine.

JIGS - Naisip ko lang na hindi pa pala ako handa sa mga ganitong bagay. Wala pa sa isip ko ang gano'n. Na-shock siguro ako sa reality na iyon na nga ang next step sa relationship namin. I mean, two years of being together and knowing each other, we're practically ready to get married, if you know what I mean. Pero I realized, I'm not ready for any of these. Narealize ko how immature I am. Na iba yung ideals ko two years ago sa ideals ko ngayon. I need to mature some more to get into this thing'I mean, getting married. Diyos ko, ilang taon lang ba ako...

YUMI - Maturity has nothing to do with age.

JIGS - But it has a lot to do with time.

Tahimik.

JIGS - So I thought, bakit kailangan ng practice mode? Ibig sabihin, pag sumablay kami, split na kami? Live like a couple minus the commitment? Pa'no pag nawala na yung magic? Goodbye na?

Iinom ng wine si Jigs.

JIGS - Kung kasal na, kasal na. Wala nang practice. I think that's the real cowardice. Yung i-try muna natin kung it will work kasi takot kayo na baka hindi maging successful ang outcome. Saan na napunta ang excitement ng buhay? Kaya nga kayo in-love, para sabay kayong humarap sa totoong buhay, sa hirap at ginahawa, di ba? (Matatawa) Hindi yung pagpapraktisan muna ninyo para siguradong ginhawa lang.

Magkikibit-balikat lang si Jigs.

YUMI - Are you always like that?

JIGS - Like what?

YUMI - So cerebral in everything. Kahit pagdating sa relationships.

JIGS - Life is too precious para lang daanin sa trial and error.

Ngingiti si Jigs. Tahimik.

YUMI - So, No hard feelings?

JIGS - Friends pa rin kami. She still calls me up nga sa bahay e.

YUMI - That's nice.

JIGS - Kayo, bakit kayo nagbreak ni Carlo?

YUMI - That's your sixth na ha?

JIGS - Sure.

YUMI - Alam mo, ironic para sa akin yung break-up namin ni Carlo. And the funny thing was, it was about...sex. Uy, sa atin lang ito ha?

JIGS - Of course.

YUMI - Kasi nga, I was looking for that magic nga di ba? I wanted to be in a relationship na special naman. So of all the boyfriends I had sa kanya lang ako walang sexual relationship. As in nag-aabstain talaga ako. Kasi parang naisip ko, para magkaroon naman ng meaning yung "making love" di ba? Parang, dapat di mo parating ginagawa, at ginagawa mo lang when you are sincere with yourself and with your partner. So I was investing muna emotionally. And I was actually starting to care about him. Yung, hindi ko na iniisip yung sarili ko. Yung siya lang ang inaalala ko. Akala ko perfect na...

JIGS - Ano'ng nangyari?

YUMI - Patunayan ko raw na mahal ko siya. Magbigay daw ako ng proof. Pagbigyan ko raw siya. Sabi ko sa kanya, hindi pa ba sapat na proof 'yon? Na I'm saving myself for that right moment, that special moment between us? Alam mo'ng ginawa? Nilayasan ako!

JIGS - You deserve someone better.

YUMI - Talaga!

YUMI - Isipin mo, kung kelan naman I grew tired of meaningless sex, when I'm looking for the real thing, saka naman mawawala. Ang ironic ng buhay no?

JIGS - That's the way we must learn.

YUMI - Alam mo, kung tutuusin, never ko pang na-experience yung tunay na mag make-love. And I had to go all through those relationships para lang ma-realize yun. At least, ngayon, alam ko na ang hinahanap ko.

Iinom ng wine.

YUMI - Ikaw ba, importante sa'yo na virgin ang mapapangasawa mo? How do you see virginity ba?

JIGS - Alam mo, di ko pa napag-isipan 'yan. Pero now that you've mentioned it...It doesn't matter kung virgin ang mapangasawa ko o hindi. Of course I value virginity a lot. I treat it as the only real gift I could give to my wife to be. Imaginin mo na lang di ba, kung wife ko ang una ko. It's like the perfect wedding gift I could give to her. Pero kung siya hindi na virgin, I wouldn't care. As long as mahal ko siya. Kasi I don't expect her to give me the same gift. I don't do something because I expect people to do the same to me. Ibigay niya sa akin ang sarili niya nang buong-buo, sapat na sa akin 'yon. Masaya na ako sa ganoon.

YUMI - (Mapapangiti si Yumi.) You know, that's the nicest thing I ever heard from a guy. That's why I always enjoy talking to you. You always say the nicest things.

JIGS - Wow. Salamat. E ikaw, is making love to you equal to love?

YUMI - I always took sex and love as opposite ideas. I mean, after the first time na...you know...sa Senior prom. Kasi afterwards, we broke up na ni Robert. Tapos naisip ko, yun na ba yung love? Baka hindi love yung naramdaman ko. Baka napagkamalan ko lang siyang love. I was just after the pleasure of intimacy. And then I felt empty. So empty. That's why I wanted to change. I wanted to believe in "making love." And I'm still looking for it. Yung magic. Yung feeling mo, tao ka pala. I never felt that kahit isang beses. Men have penetrated my body but never my soul. And I wanted that. I wanted someone to touch my soul. To "make love" to my soul through my body. Pero siguro, naging numb na'ko sa dami ng relasyong pinagdaanan ko. Hindi ko alam kung mararanasan ko pa iyon. That's why I envy you.

Tahimik.

YUMI - Sa tingin mo may pag-asa pa ako?

JIGS - You still have your soul...(Ngingiti)

Tahimik.

YUMI - With whom would you want to experience it?

JIGS - Of course, sa asawa ko.

YUMI - I mean, someone in particular. Take it as my seventh question. So give a name.

JIGS - A name? Hindi ko alam. Basta kung sino ang magiging asawa ko.

Tahimik. Magkikibit-balikat si Yumi. Iinom ng wine.

JIGS - Well, I always thought na it was Krissy. And then, it was just gone. Of course I loved her. And I still do. Pero the magic was just gone after we both found out na magkaiba kami ng mga prinsipyo sa buhay.

Tahimik.

JIGS - My turn?

YUMI - Shoot me.

JIGS - Tell me something...a secret. Yung wala kahit isang nakakaalam.

Matagal na katahimikan.

JIGS - You trust me naman di ba?

YUMI - Well, you've earned it, alright.

JIGS - Saka wala akong tinatago sa'yo. Sinagot ko lahat ng tanong mo as honestly as I could. (Ngingiti)

YUMI - I uhm...

JIGS - Yes...?

YUMI - I need more wine.

Magsasalin si Jigs ng wine.

JIGS - Take your time. We have less than fifty hours to go.

Iinom ng wine si Yumi.

YUMI - I'll tell you something no one in the world knows except one other person. And that person probably forgot all about me already.

JIGS - (Pabiro) What? You had sex with a stranger?

YUMI - Ano ka ba?

JIGS - Biro lang. Seryoso na.

YUMI - Promise ha? Hindi ito lalabas.

JIGS - Promise.

YUMI - If this goes out, I will hunt you kahit sa libingan mo. Huhukayin kita at papatayin kita ulit.

JIGS - Mamatay man ako ngayon.

YUMI - Okay...(Pause) I...I was with Joel then... (Magiging mas seryoso ang tono niya) ...and Zach. I wasn't really with Zach, I was just going out with him pag wala si Joel, alam mo na...making out and stuff...Well, anyway, I was kinda serious din naman with Joel that time. Joel and I were...you know...doing it. And...

JIGS - And...?

YUMI - Uhm...I...uhm...I got pregnant.

JIGS - What?

Tahimik. Iinom ng wine si Yumi.

YUMI - I uhm...shit. Hindi ko naman talaga ginusto e. Uhm...Two months akong delayed...then I took that test. I found out na buntis nga ako...and Joel found out about Zach (maluha-luha na) and I didn't know what to say, you know? Maniniwala ba naman sa akin si Joel na naaliw lang ako kay Zach? Na I didn't really love him? Na wala lang iyon? And so he broke up with me and...I..uhm...I was afraid and uhm...
(Magsisimula siyang magbreak-down)

JIGS - It's okay...

YUMI - I uhm...hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko, Joel left me. I wanted to tell him about the baby to make him come back but I don't think he'd believe me after the thing with Zach...and...my parents are gonna kill me if...shit. (iiyak)

JIGS - (lalapit kay Yumi para i-console ito) Ssshhh...you don't have to tell me this if it upsets you...

YUMI - And so I went to a clinic...(hahagulgol) I didn't mean to, Jigs. I wasn't myself then. And I felt so afraid. So alone...

JIGS - Tahan na. Ssshhh...

Iiyak lang si Yumi kay Jigs. Yayakapin ni Jigs si Yumi.

JIGS - Alam ba 'to ni Joel?

YUMI - How can I tell him? The only other person na nakakaalam ay yung duktor sa clinic. God...(iiyak) Oh God...

JIGS - It's alright...

Hihimasin ni Jigs ang likod ni Yumi. Patatahanin niya ito. Matagal silang nakaganito lang.

Matagal na katahimikan.

YUMI - Can you get me my yosi?

Tatayo si Jigs. Pupunta sa may side table sa tabi ng kama. Kukunin ang yosi ni Yumi. Magsisindi siya ng isa at iaabot kay Yumi.

YUMI - Thanks...

Matagal na katahimikan.

YUMI - If we were...if we were the last two people on earth, would you consider doing it with me?

JIGS - Doing what?

YUMI - Alam mo na...

JIGS - Alin? (Teasing ngingiti)

YUMI - Gago mo. (Ngingiti)

JIGS - Ngumiti rin.

YUMI - So? Would you?

JIGS - Alin nga? Di mo masabi no? Bakit di mo masabi?
(Pagtatawanan si Yumi) Sabihin mo nga: Sex! Sex! Sex! Sex!

YUMI - Shut up nga!

JIGS - That's your eight na, ha?

YUMI - I lost count. Answer it.

JIGS - Why not?

Hihithit ng yosi si Yumi. Tahimik. Sasandal si Yumi sa balikat ni Jigs.

JIGS - If you could be something else, what would you be?

YUMI - I dunno...maybe a violin...yeah. Violin siguro.

JIGS - Bakit?

YUMI - I always saw the relationship of a violin and its player as very intimate. Pag tumutugtog ang violinist, ang nakikita ko at naririnig ko, he strokes the soul of the instrument and the instrument penetrates the soul of the player. Para silang nagmi-make love. Diba? Very sexy, very intimate, very sublime. Di ba? Pareho silang sincere sa isa't isa. Dahil kung hindi sila sincere, walang music na mabubuo. The violin surrenders her body to her player, her whole body and her whole soul, in full trust and sincerity. Di ba, compared to the sound of the other instruments, ang tunog ng violin parang isang naked woman? A naked woman in surrender? I want to be a violin. I want to be stroked in the soul. I want to make sincere music. I want to experience the sound of love.

Tahimik.

JIGS - Lalim nun ah. (Ngingiti)

YUMI - Pa'no mo malalamang in-love ka na?

JIGS - Paano? I don't think there's a formula to that. Basta malalaman mo na lang. I mean, ilang beses lang ba nangyari sa akin 'yon? I'd like to believe na yun na nga 'yon...yung kay Krissy...

YUMI - Kwento mo nga...paano mo narealize dati na mahal mo nga si Krissy?

JIGS - Alam mo nakakatawa...korni actually. Babalik na naman ako sa pagiging korni nito e. Di ba ayaw mo sa korni.

YUMI - Sige na. Hindi na kita aasarin.

JIGS - I heard bells.

YUMI - Ano?

JIGS - Seryoso. Bigla na lang, habang nag-uusap kami, may narinig na lang akong bells, tapos music. Ewan ko kung iniimagine ko lang 'yon pero yun ang nangyari. Nakakatawa nga e. Parang kanta ng Beatles.

YUMI - Seryoso ka ba?

JIGS - O baka naman nagkataon noong oras na yon, may nagkakantahan sa kung saan sa school. Basta may narinig akong bells. Tapos napangiti ako. Pagtingin ko sa mata niya, iba na ang nakikita ko. Hindi ko na siya nakita as kabarkada lang. Biglang parang may magic. Hindi ko ma-explain. Baduy pero ganun. Tapos I just seized the moment. Umamin ako. A week later, kami na.

YUMI - Korni nga. (Matatawa)

JIGS - Korni talagang pakinggan. Pero pag nandun ka na. Pag naranasan mo na, feeling mo, hindi na korni.

Ngingiti si Yumi. Tahimik.

YUMI - Alam mo, may times na parang tunog violin ang boses mo. O lasing lang ako?

Tahimik.

JIGS - I'm into my last question.

Iaangat ni Yumi ang ulo niya.

YUMI - Shoot me. Better make it good.

JIGS - If you were again to be the next victim of this tradition, if you were to be locked up in this room again...who would you want the next guy to be?

YUMI - (Mag-iisip) I want someone whom I could talk to... Yung makukwentuhan ko ng mga sikreto ko. Yung may sense makipag-usap. Yung may laman. The violin player who'd stroke my strings...not even. Yung mapapatunog niya ang strings ko without even touching them. (Tahimik)
Lumuluwag na ang dila ko...kung anu-ano na ang nasasabi ko.
(Ngingiti)

Tititigan lang ni Jigs si Yumi. Tahimik.

YUMI - Siyempre yung masarap kausap.

Tahimik. Hindi makatingin si Yumi.

YUMI - Yung kahit habambuhay wala kaming gawin kundi mag-usap... I think it's better than making love.

Mapapatingin si Yumi kay Jigs.

YUMI - Gosh I want to kiss you so badly.

Matitigilan siya.

YUMI - I can't believe I just said that.

Tahimik. Titignan niya ulit si Jigs.

YUMI - Don't you want to kiss me?

Pause. Titignan siya ni Jigs sa mata.

JIGS - Is that your last question? (Ngingiti si Jigs)

YUMI - Yes.

DILIM.

r u drugs...

2005-11-15T11:54:00.000+08:00

haha. tpos ssbhn ako...am i on drugs daw dhil kung anu2 na dw cnsbi ko.im paranoid as hell daw...hahaha. damn right i am! cno kaya may kasalanan? may pa-God-God pa sya....

PANO. MAGTATANONG. MAGTATANONG SAKEN KNG ANO TANONG KO. NUNG SINABI KO NA...WALANG SAGOT.

EH PUTANGINA PALA EH. LAGI SYANG GANON. LAGI. NOT ONCE...NOT TWICE...NOT 3X.....ALWAYS.

ALWAYS PAG MAGULO O MAY NANGYAYARI.

PARANOID AKO? CGE. OK LANG.

EH DI SANA CNBI NYA NA N22LOG PLA SYA KNINA PA BAGO NYA TINANONG SAKEN KNG ANO TANONG KO. EH DI SANA PINA2LOG KO MUNA SYA AT NDI MUNAKO NGDADADAKDAK.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

MEN!!! I SWEAR!!!!!!!!! PULO'T DULO NYAN SI ADAN EH!

AT OO SI EBA! PERO TONG C ADAN......TANGA SUMUNOD! I SWEAR!!!!!!!!!

MAN can he really push my buttons.....or dat CERTAIN BUTTON na sobrang tagong-tago na ndi dpat talaga i-push pero putangina tlaga! Pinagkakaiwas-iwas na nga.......pero he's still pushing it!!!!!!! Only that man can do dat tlga!!! I swear!

HAHAHA. IM ON DRUGS NGA CGURO.

AMFFFF

2005-11-15T09:48:00.000+08:00

naiinis tlga ako pag...1) ndi sinasagot agad tanong ko...alam nyang madami akong tanong..tpos tatanungin nya anu un...tpos pag tinanong ko na finally....ndi nman ako sasagutin agad. PUTANGINA. nakakapikon to the max. it pisses me off and i so fuckin hate it. it's really a pet peeve of mine. as in, and, 2) pag nananadya...at pag alam mong may tinatago....kaya ayaw sagutin yung tanong mo and andaming excuses....AMFFFFFFFFF!

i've learned a long time ago to trust my instincts.....and now its telling me something's up. again.

oh dear God...wat is it this tym?.........

ho-hum...

2005-11-14T15:38:00.000+08:00

i'm being sooo lazy today... i swear isn't there a job where you're getting paid just by sleeping and watching tv and surfin the net?......

lunch tym a few hours ago, we ate at mcdo and i told them, i don't want to be an employee anymore. it gets boring after sometime you know? i just cant imagine my whole life doing the same shit everyday...going to the same office...dealing with the same boss (who by the way is not someone i want to talk to or even see everyday...kz break na kami..hmp)...doing the same job without any challenge at all....

i told my sister i wanted the two of us to put up a biznes...i dont know what kind of bizness yet but thats just what i want and what i imagine to be doing for quite a long time...that i know i would really enjoy............(sana...)

at first we thought of a store and she said, "buti kee" (lizard)--jologs counterpart of lacoste....pucha. cant she think of something more imaginative? my gawd...but she said it would be a hit because canadians wont have any idea at all what it means and it sounds weird daw but cool........

sure.

but she's forgetting that there are so many filipinos in canada and they know what butee kee means and they'll just laugh at us....and soon everyone will get what the name of our store really means. it sounds like a kind of food or something....but oh...she's really serious ha...

anyway...for the mean time i can accept butee kee mainly bcoz i cant think of an alternative name so i hope our small boti que will be a hit... *rolls eyes* if you guyz ever see butee kee store in the future....yup...that's ours! hahaha...

my sister wants to get paid just by sleeping and she asked my mom if there's a job liek that....and my mom said....YAH...like...maybe a prostitute!

my mom said BE A WHORE. yeah...(that's how we talk around our house especially when it's just me, my sis and my mom..)

anyway so my mom wanted to be the pimp and she'll market my sister, being the white lady that she is, to those perverts who like to do it w/ dead people......my mom tells my sister...that if she just wants to sleep she can do so...just lie down and 'open up' and sleep...pretend she's dead......

LOL. actually, this isnt our weirdest and grossest convo...we've had worse.

but we just laugh our asses off...goodness...

...then one of my ofismates suggested that i could do the same although this time...i can pretend im dead...sleep inside the coffin...so that crooks can pretend they're just attendin a wake but really...they're just playin jueteng........wat a way to do a lazy job....hahaha...

...any more suggestions?

speaking of suggestions....i need a theme for my sister's bridal shower.......

could we also wear costumes? hahaha ano halloween? hahaha...

i'm doing nothing. just blogging.......i need to revamp this site......next layout -- HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE!!!

wooopeeeee my baby and i will be watching hp4 this sat.......i miss u soooooo much baby ko! i luv yah soooooo much! yari ka rin saken sa sat...tangina.

ayoko ng ginagalit ako...

2005-11-10T12:22:00.000+08:00

pota ah....ako talaga ndi na natutuwa ah.

ndi ako sinasagot...o ndi ako sinasagot ng matino.

i am now officially...MAD. sori just wont do anymore...

this is life...

2005-11-08T12:29:00.000+08:00

a poem i co-wrote w/ a friend. a very old poem indeed. i'm going to delete this one from my archive, just want to get rid of it. DON'T ASK WHY. when i read it again, i thought *blecchh* oh well...ha ha.

this is life

i know it's common to say
that i never ever felt this way
ever since i met you
for the first time i didn't have a clue
what to do
to keep your eyes looking at mine
to live my life knowing you'll always
come running to be by my side

see i didn't care before i knew you
i never opened my eyes
before i met you
and i didn't realize
that it's one thing to live your life
and it's another to love it
for loving someone so right

that's why i never lived
before i loved you
i'm telling you
this is life
you made it better
it could be the best
i'll thank you forever

i know it's superficial
just hearing you say my name
makes me feel so special
i just can't help but love you more
when i see the way you smile your smile
i don't know what i'd say
if they ask me what i'd do
when you go away
even if one kiss from you is enough
to make me smile for days

but i didn't care before i knew you
and i never opened my eyes
before i met you
i didn't realize
that it's one thing to live your life
and it's another to love it
for loving someone so right

i've never lived
before i loved you
i'm telling you
this is life
you made it better
it could be the best
i'll thank you forever

meantime girl

2005-11-08T12:19:00.000+08:00

*found this from one of my cds...a very very old forwarded email that i saved..........well just thought i'd post it.....*

What's a MEANTIME GIRL?

She's the one you call when you're bored because she makes you laugh. She's the one you talk to when you're feeling down because she's willing to lend an ear and be a friend. She's not the one you call when you need a date to your company's Christmas party, or to go dancing with on a Saturday night. She's the one you spend time with between girlfriends, before you find "The One". You know, the one who you keep around in the meantime.

She's not one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you don't look at her as a "real" woman, either. She's not bitchy enough, moody enough, or sexy enough to be seen in that light. She's too laid-back, too easily amused by the same things your male buddies are amused by. She's too understanding, too comfortable ñ she doesn't make you feel nervous or excited the way a "real" woman does. But she's cool, and nice, and funny, and attractive enough that when you're lonely or horny and need intimate female companionship, she'll do just fine.

You don't have to wine and dine her because she knows the real you already, and you don't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve. You're not trying to get anything of substance out of her. She's not easy, but you know that she cares about you and is attracted to you, and that she'll give you the intimacy you need. And you know you don't have to explain yourself or the situation, that she'll be able to cope with the fact that this isn't the beginning of a relationship or that there's any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her.

It won't bother her that you'll get up in the morning, put on your pants, say goodbye, and go on a date with the woman you've been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you. She'll settle for a goodbye hug and a promise to call her and tell her how the date went. She's just so cool . . . why can't all women be like that?!

But deep down, if you really think about it (which you probably don't because to you, the situation between the two of you isn't important enough to merit any real thought), you know that it's really not fair. You know that although she would never say it, it hurts her to know that despite all her good points and all the fun you two have, you don't think she's good enough to spend any real time with.

Sure, it's mostly her fault, because she doesn't have to give in to your needs ñ she could play the hard-to-get bitch like the rest of them do, if she really wanted to. But you and she both know that she probably couldn't pull it off. Maybe she's too short, or a little overweight, or has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Taco Bell. Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman. So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, the secret lover, and you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow be everything you ever wanted in a woman.

You'll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, and she'll laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental tux.

She doesn't captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile. Mainly she blends in with the crowd. She's safe. She doesn't want to be the center of attention and turn the heads of everyone in the room. But she wants to turn someone's head. She wants to be special to someone, too. We all do.

She has feelings. She has a heart. In fact, she probably has a bigger and better heart than any woman you've ever known because she's had a front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, and she likes you anyway. She obviously sees something worthwhile and redeeming in you because although you've given her nothing, absolutely no reason to still be around, she is.

Anyway, yeah. I'm a Meantime Girl. Been one more times than I care to admit. I don't know the reason, really, and at this point I don't even care. I just want to let every guy know who's ever had the good fortune to have a Meantime Girl that we may be a lot of fun, but we cry, too. A lot. And someday we won't be around.

deadly silence

2005-11-07T16:47:00.000+08:00

last txt he mde was yday......saying, "hu wer u w/ yday..pls tell me.....cguro u hav sum1 new na noh...:-( luv yah so mch"

so naturally, i would reply and tell him dat...i was just out with my mom and sis.....blablabla....also asking him where he was and wat he's doing.......

then silence.

??????

that was like yesterday afternoon around 12? no text watsoever after that.....

....24 hrs has passed..........still no answer? WAT THE FUCK?????

not only am i mad.....i also think im gonna die worrying abt where his ass could be right now.....muthahfuckin shit!

i swear.......i'd appreciate more if i'll receive a txt saying "I DONT WANT 2 TALK 2 U RIGHT NOW OK?!?!" than just this utterly annoying, "i-think-i'm-going-to-be-sick-enough-for-me-to-blow-my-brains-out-my-head" silence that i'm getting from him.....

What Kind of Queen Are You?

2005-11-02T10:03:00.000+08:00

You are a Air Queen. You and your kingdom are
happy. Dreaming and Feelings are very
important.

What kind of Queen are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

rainy day....sarap mag...s**

2005-10-27T15:12:00.000+08:00

sobrang nakakatamad...umuulan...madilim ang langit...

pag-gising ko nga kanina ayoko pa talaga bumangon kasi malamig...madilim... ansarap matulog...

pagdating ko ofis...ndi pako naka-kape...bad trip. tpos sa sobrang antok ko...habang binabasa ko yung training document na AKO MISMO ANG GUMAWA...ndi ko namalayan na nakatulog nako.

pambihirang patis...tinulugan ko SARILI KONG GAWA...pano pa kaya pag binasa ng iba yun...dang.

tapos nung lunch nag-SEX kami. that's right. andami namin non. sa may BF...

Haha... sarap pala mag-sex.. eh pano libre eh tatanggi bako?... lalo tuloy masarap. HAHAH.

oo try nyo... Sinangag Express sa BF Parañaque. o ano...kala nyo ah.......

pagdating opis.....tulog uli ako hahaha. soooooooo boring.

my ofismate na nagresign last friday... c papa chaps. i love that guy. shet..ndi man lang nagpaalam.

anyway he just got back para daw mag-"turnover" hahaha. wala nako ka-group hug. pesteng yun umalis-alis pa kasi. sbi ko bumalik na sya sa Anxa...sbi nya wag na lang eh aalis din nman daw ako next year...sino na daw kagroup hug nya...

eh sbi ko......kukunin ko nman sya sa canada... fiance visa...hahahaha. pakasal kami...pero kontrata lang......walang sex. hahahah.

sbi nila...ano yun magbabayad b daw c chaps.......sbi naman ng ungas sex na lang ang bayad. pucha. ano ba yan! sbi ko...magsex na lng sya sa BF...masarap pa hehehe.

anyshit.......wala lang kasi ako magawa......i miss my baby so much. but i don't know kng.....ano mangyayari samen.....ang gulo ng utak nya....ano ba talaga gus2 nya.................i'm so friggin depressed....

buti pa mga guys...madaling mag-move on. if this thing turns out really bad.......i guess i'll try my best again to move on. dati nagawa ko nman eh....magawa ko pa kaya sana.................=.(

break break down

2005-10-26T12:44:00.000+08:00

Breakdown
by Mariah Carey (feat. Bone Thugs N' Harmony)

(Krayzie Bone)
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down

You called yesterday
To basically say...
That you care for me but...
That you're just not in love
Immediately I pretended to be
Feeling similarly
And led you to believe
I was... ok to just... walk away from the
One thing that's unyielding and sacred to me

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes
To prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm...
Slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of smile
Gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel
And I lie convincingly
Cause I don't want to reveal...
The fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise
Til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights
And then I breakdown and cry

So what do you do when...
Somebody you're so devoted to
Suddenly just stops loving you
And it seems they haven't got a clue...
Of the pain that rejection is putting you through
Do you cling to your pride...
And sing "I Will Survive"
Do you lash out and say
How dare you leave this way...
Do you hold on in vain
As they just slip away...

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes
To prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm...
Slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of smile
Gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel
And I lie convincingly
Cause I don't want to reveal...
The fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise
Til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights
And then I breakdown and cry

(Krayzie Bone)
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down
Break, breakdown
Steady breaking me on down

(Wish Bone)
Better break it down
Only if you let it
Everyday the situation is rockin' my mind
Tryin' to break me down
But i won't let it
Forget it ( forget it)

(Krayzie Bone)
I'll be feelin' like it gonna break me down
Turnin' me around
Stressin' me out
I'm thinkin it gonna get out
And let me release some stress ( stress )

(Wish Bone)
Don't ever wanna feel no pain ( pain )
Hoping for the sun
But it looks like rain ( rain, rain, rain )
Oh, i just wanna maintain

(Krayzie Bone)
Yeah, i'm feelin' precious, yo
But nevertheless Krayzie won't fall
It's over, it's ending here... here

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes
To prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm...
Slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of smile
Gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel
And I lie convincingly
Cause I don't want to reveal...
The fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise
Til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights
And then I breakdown and cry

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes
To prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm...
Slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of smile
Gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel
And I lie convincingly
Cause I don't want to reveal...
The fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise
Til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights
And then I breakdown and cry

Well I guess I'm trying to be nonchalant about it
And I'm going to extremes
To prove I'm fine without you
But in reality I'm...
Slowly losing my mind
Underneath the guise of smile
Gradually I'm dying inside
Friends ask me how I feel
And I lie convincingly
Cause I don't want to reveal...
The fact that I'm suffering
So I wear my disguise
Til I go home at night
And turn down all the lights
And then I breakdown and cry...

stubborn me.

2005-10-23T19:36:00.000+08:00

why? WHY? why am i so fuckin stubborn???

why do i keep on going back to where i was before.....emotionally????

oh yah. coz i love him. right.

and i do. i love him to death.

but why? WHY DID IT COME TO THIS??????

finally...i got to know the truth. the fuckin painful truth. it was.........it did sting somehow. but what hurt me the most...was the way he handled it.

i thought i can only see it in the movies....how life can be so unfair. how life bites back. how life can really pull a person down.

i thought i can only see it in the movies......where one can really have a breakdown......and shout to the skies....w/ that overly dramatic way of cursing the heavens.....kneeling down on the ground........ screaming at the top of your lungs....

WHHHHHYYYYYYYY?! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?! WAAAHHH.

but somehow...that made me laugh. hahahah. i can't believe it's happening to me.

im dis close to breaking down..dis close..the gap between these 2 dots..

isang kalabit lang...wahh BAM ZAP BOOM M DEAD.

and somehow....in spite of the harshness of it all......i feel loved. i feel strong....when he's strong.

when he's weak...i'm weak.

but...ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

i'm tired of hiding and sacrificing our relationship for 'their' sake.

so i gave him an ultimatum.......

friday is the deadline. or more like...doomsday...

we'll see wat happens til then....

God help me....save me.

join nman kayo.

2005-10-23T19:14:00.000+08:00

hey, i just finished building the fanlisting for "tattooed on my mind" by d'sound. join kayo ha... i know you guys love that song.

http://fan.empty-words.net/tattooed/

thanks!

uhhh...OK.

2005-10-22T20:48:00.000+08:00

funny...i have this batchmate for almost 10 yrs sa seton... he was my seatmate nong grade 4 ako...and then nong 4th yr hs ako.

nong 4th yr hs.....somehow...he developed this crush on me...

and NOW...he sent me a msg sa frendster after so many years na walang contact........

he txted me last night...and then hours ago.....asking how i was...

and then....he asked, "is it ok if i tell u i missed you?"

and i'm like...."y r you asking for my permission....you just said it..."

what the pt right? oh well...

and then...he said..."2 b honest w u....i actually still think of u"

?????

like he never got over me or something.

i was overly flattered....but really shocked and...kinda freaked out.

i mean... that was like 5 years ago! we never talked or met each other since 4th yr hs.

he did try to make a move...but he was so discreet and shy and it freaked me out! hahaha...i'm soooo weird.

i guess i want a guy who's more.....outspoken...and direct and...kinda aggressive.

but he said something much worse.....

he said, he did so many things just to see me.

and i'm like ........................

wat the hell?

and then...he apologizes. as if that would make me forget about what he just told me.

and then he said, "i hope ndi ka mailang....wala lang yun...."

wala lang ung cnbi nya. WALA LANG!?

UH..OK.

i mean...i don't want to assume anything here....and i don't want to be "feeling" nman...but i don't want to be naive.

so i guess all i can say right now nga is....uhhhh... OK.

backfire

2005-10-19T12:47:00.000+08:00

this is the longest time na quiet kami....ndi kami gano ngttxtan....bilang na bilang......
record breaker....
i swear i'm dying inside coz i want so bad to text him and talk to him but i can't na.....
i'm just so scared magkagulo na nman.....
i just hope.....he's not mad.....or he's not hurt......
my heart has been broken so baaadly before...
that's why.....konting ANO lang.......nasasaktan agad ako...o natatakot ako agad.
gabi-gabi...araw-araw....i cry because i miss him....and i want to text him and ask how he is....
i don't want him to think i don't care about him anymore.......i love him so much!
i'm so sorry by....
i'm really really sorry.....
i feel like i'm pushing him away..........and i'm starting to hate myself na...
fuck....it's my fault what happened before......and i guess i have to accept the conseequences....
i just don't know if i can really accept the idea of losin him......i just can't im sorry...
i can't.

truth hurts...so does TRUE love.

2005-10-16T13:51:00.000+08:00

so lately...i feel worn-out...

these past few days... i went through a really grave, fast, and exhausting emotional ride... one day i'm down... i go up.... weeks after i'm down again... then up. if i have to compare it to a real rollercoaster... it would be the Kingda Ka roller coaster located at Six Flags Great Adventure in Jackson, New Jersey. Didn't mean to plug the coaster or theme park there...but i heard it's the tallest and fastest roller coaster on the planet. i have NEVER dared to ride big roller coasters... but i can just imagine it feels like it's going to be a suicide. anyway, it's just soooo hard to take a time out and breathe....

i always have this fear inside my chest......and it just won't go away. i'm so pissed i can't even understand why i always feel this way. it's so sad and weird for me sometimes...everytym i cross the street...it's like i'm always telling to myself..."yeah just run over me you bastards"

i can't help feeling this way......suicidal b ang pota. haha.

wats worse.... you love somebody.... and yet you doubt him. you doubt yourself... you doubt your happines... your love. sometimes i can't help but be really sad and cry and sulk at every corner of our haus. it's just so pathetic...and yet all i know is to love is to be pathetic sometimes. you wallow in your insecurities.......and you end up pitying yourself. ugh. should that be part of being in-love... or should it be part of loving someone? even if you think it's true love?

what is true love?????? true love is when you love and what? end up getting old together...? or can it be felt even if you don't end up with that someone? then how would you classify love as TRUE? when both of you are true to yourselves? when you tell someone what you TRULY feel? that you TRULY love them? that you will only tell them the TRUTH? or did mankind just came up with this term for absolutely no fucking reason at all? maybe they just want us to seek for what we think IS true love for us... but we end up questioning it again. WHAT IS TRUE LOVE? i loved this person...i loved him/her deeply...it's true love...but he/she ended up marrying someone else....but i still love him/her and i'm happy for him/her??? FUCK THAT. THAT'S TRUE LOVE?!??!?

well...i felt that...

ahhh i see.......now i understand. yes, yes... true love exists. they always say "truth hurts..." and when it's true love... in the end... you may still feel love but it can still hurt you... in one way or another. so i should not feel pathetic... rather, i should feel... happy... that the truth...came to me at all.

Nuninuninuni...

2005-10-12T11:02:00.000+08:00

bat ba ayaw mo magparamdam nix? reply sa ym or txt ala... watsrong?

ihip ng hangin...

2005-10-10T23:01:00.000+08:00

sobra nagiba tlaga ang ihip ng hangin...

bigla parang..........ngbago sya.

weird. i cant explain how...bt...i can see it very clearly...and it's really weird.

i hope this time...it's for real.

and 2morow il c him agen. fuck.

breathe in...breathe out.

the perfect man

2005-10-09T20:48:00.000+08:00

Good things aren't real. They don't come true. It is either, it is doomed to fail or i'd end up getting hurt. It is why i have this habit of not letting other people in and when they come too close, i let them go, ran away or expect too much from them that i hurt & scare them away. And so that's what i thought...

But when i watched the perfect man last night, it nudged my heart. It made me realize that letting go, running away or expecting too much to scare others is not always the answer. There are those who would stand by you no matter what. There are those who would choose to be with you because life is better by your side than to be in any other place in the world. Most of the times that i allow other people to walk out of my life, i think that i would be okay because i'd find new ones. But new people are only new for a day. They would eventually be the ones who would excite, cheer, care, frustrate, disappoint or even hurt me. And when i keep avoiding them i end up avoiding myself, i end up avoiding those who love me and even to the extent of avoiding my life. I must learn to take the chance to know and learn to let people in and realize that good things do happen. And that someone in my life is really worth it if only i had given that person a chance...

" There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blessed to end up with that
somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever..."

ang gulo...

2005-10-05T18:11:00.000+08:00

asan na ba kmi...

ang hirap pala ng ganito...

pero it's just so funny how we really hold on to each other...

parang wala nang bukas. w/c is a gud thing right? =.(

i only have one wish...but i'm afraid again it won't come true.

ok fine...i'll just hope then...

i HOPE... i get to spend my last Christmas here in the Philippines... w/ him. i love you so much baby ko.

happy now???

2005-10-04T15:19:00.000+08:00

this is what everyone wants right!?

well guess what... YOU WON!!!

people (and fuckin things around us) who just wants us separated.

YOU FUCKIN WON!!!

there! YOU FUCKIN HAPPY?!?! he's gone!

aren't you just soo ecstatic??

nikki LOST.

she's now miserable. HAHA.

funny. how can you fuckin lose if it's not a game.

oh well...the important thing here is i'm not happy anymore.

everybody hates him... everybody wants him out of my life.

YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND.

fuck! i love my life. I HOPE EVERYONE IS HAPPY!!!

I HOPE EVERYONE IS SO FUCKIN CONTENTED NOW.

sore

2005-10-04T14:26:00.000+08:00

my whole body is so sore.

i'm so sorry for everything.

i love you so much anjelo. i love you so much baby ko.

new layout -- JD Fortune

2005-10-03T23:13:00.000+08:00

I need an escape...and my new interest and inspiration is JD Fortune.

MY GAAAWD...he's yummy. I can just eat him alive!!!

Next year I'll be in Canada... here comes mama! Haha.

I love this guy so much..........

Hey...yeah...he looks like........*ahem* someone I knew back then.......*dreamy eyes*.... who was that again??? Kwek??

*Ubo*Papa*Skinhead*Ubo* LOL.

when huh? WHEN???

2005-10-03T18:51:00.000+08:00

...not seeing him for a couple of days is already sooo FUCKIN painful...

what more if you know you won't see him for...GOD KNOWS HOW LONG...

WORSE...YOU DON'T KNOW EXACTLY IF YOU'LL EVER SEE HIM AGAIN.

FUUUUUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK THIS LIFE!!!

I HATE THIS!!!

I FUCKIN HATE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!

check dis out!

2005-09-28T23:09:00.000+08:00

check out my fanlisting site for D'Sound's album "Beauty Is A Blessing"

yeepeee! hehehe...

http://blessing.lovebroke.org

tiktakkkk

2005-09-26T15:25:00.000+08:00

finally nasabi ko rin sa knya ang mga gus2 kong sabihin.

eh tangina nman kasi eh...i have 5 months left na nga... HIRAP NA HIRAP NA NGAKO EH.

tangina. imbis na masiyahan ako...puro sama ng loob lang nararamdaman ko.

you think i want to feel like this?!?! you think i like being angry?!?! you think masarap yung feeling?!

tangina yan. all i want is some person i can lean on and love...AND SOMEONE I CAN TRUST. but noooooo... you can't always get what you want.

Me and Anj

2005-09-25T23:31:00.000+08:00

....eve of anj's bday

pressure ito

2005-09-24T22:48:00.000+08:00

waaahh! i cant believe na-approve application ko sa thefanlistings.org. hehehe.

for ages...i've dreamed of owning a fanlisting...bwahahahah! finally!

i applied for the band "D'Sound" mismo, their song "Tattooed On My Mind", and their album "Beauty Is A Blessing" kng san andon ung Tattooed...

heheh. pano na kaya....naexcite ako na napressure bigla heheh.

*sigh*

What Type of a Killer Are You?

2005-09-23T12:25:00.000+08:00

You kill for revenge.
That is because you have lost something or
someone you held very dear. Now you can't seem
to get over the loss that marked your soul, and
the only solution is to go after the one person
who brought all this pain to you. Chances are
you are angry inside and you bottle everything
up and don't talk to anyone about it. People
may want to help, but you think that they can
never understand your pain and only get
frustrated because of this. But it is important
to see all that you have left and be thankful
of that even if you have lost something great.
It may not be true that Times heals all wounds,
but with time and talking about your feelings,
maybe the hurt will ease.

Main weapon: Yourself
Quote: "You can close your eyes to
reality but not to memories" -Stainslaw J.
Lec
Facial expression: Gritted teeth and
teary eyes

What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

what's going on

2005-09-20T17:56:00.000+08:00

there's this nagging feeling again...somewhere in my stomach...that's telling me something's definitely going on...

something WRONG...very very wrong is happening...

and i just couldn't put my finger on what it is...

AND, again, i probably won't know what it is exactly, so how will i fix this...

lately (or is it, as always...?) my heart's becoming stubborn and it's so fucking hard to try and fix things...

time out

2005-09-13T15:09:00.000+08:00

i realized...that i just won't be able to bear another heartache...

i'm so bruised... i haven't completely healed yet...

i hope someone could sympathize... empathize w/ me...

in 2 wks time... it's payday again. (yey!)

i need a break.

nuninuninuni

2005-09-12T17:53:00.000+08:00

wow for the first time...wala ako masabi. pero kailangan kong magpost everyday.

so here's what happened today....after lunch knina, i went up... sa pinakatuktok ng bldg nmin.......

malayo ang tingin......muni-muni........and i cried again.

pucha. i'm tired of being so emotional. ndi kaya may hormonal imbalance nako.

i think too much. and i can't help it. lately, i feel like i'm slowly falling apart... i think i'm going crazy...i need serious help.

they say, when you're in love, you feel high... complete... i should feel complete...but i feel like i'm still missing a lot...

i hav the love of my life... i love him to death...

but i also hav so many problems on top of so many existing problems... am i crazy for worrying too much?

or do i just need to make things right? sort out some issues and stuff in my life......?

i only have six months left to do just that...

and i just don't know if i can do it... i'm scared out of my wits...

scared...

2005-09-11T21:52:00.000+08:00

yes. i'm so scared........i've never been this scared before.

i think......i'm gona die. hahahaha.

im so scared but i dont know anyone who i can turn to and tel him/her dat...i'm so fuckin scared.

of what?

that i cannot tell............. =.(

suicide

2005-09-11T16:17:00.000+08:00

why is it so hard to think about something... especially if that something...is about to change your life forever... and that something is what you have been dreading and avoiding... something that you don't ever want to happen.

every time i think about leaving...... another part of me rots...and dies...

i feel weaker everyday. and sicker everyday.

time won't ever stop. i just hear every second ticking away... i feel more helpless and hopeless.

every time i think about the people so close to my heart... especially the one closest to my heart........ i sometimes pray for some meteor to just fall fast from the sky and go through the roof just above my room and hit me in the head real hard.

kind of harsh... but really it's something that might be less painful than what i'm feeling right now.

losing him is something that i really never wanted to think about and dared to even imagine again since i already experienced not having him in my life last year.........

and it was a part of my life that i just try to repress...... because my life then was empty.... and i loved him so much even if i thought i would never ever see him again...

but lately...realizing that i have to accept the awful truth and painful fuckin reality......that maybe... JUST MAYBE......... no matter what i do...no matter how hard i try..... things just won't go my way.

like right now, i feel like everything that i hold dear...... everything that i want to protect is slowly slipping away from my hands............

worse is...the past keeps on haunting me. no matter where i go...no matter where i turn...i see it. and i feel it. and i'm sick of it.

i'm already tired, physically and mentally, i'm emotionally exhausted....i'm already so fuckin weak.......... and no one's giving me strength... nothing and no one is giving me the inspiration to even muster up the strength to go on.

never in my life have i realized that everything that's happening in my life.... everything that i fear...and everything that i have to do from now on.... feels more like, in itself...a suicide.

if i do this....it's like i'm ending my life.....

the life i loved so much. the life i want to have. the life where the people i love are just there........the life that keeps me alive.

even if i fight this............i'm bound to just give up.

the more i fight...the more i will lose....

if i already tried slowly to accept last year that he won't ever come back to me... and i won't ever see him...

then maybe this time... i just have to imagine how my life was last year...

i already experienced it... so i know i could... just try it out again...

i mean... how much harder could it be....?

last year i felt empty... what's happening now is already killing me...

so maybe after all of these... i won't ever feel a thing.

I Can't Make You Love Me

2005-09-10T19:43:00.000+08:00

by Bonnie Raitt
(M. Reid/A. Shamblin)

Turn down the lights
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices inside my head
Lay down with me
Tell me no lies
Just hold me close
Don't patronize...
Don't patronize me

Cause I can't make you love me...
If you don't...
You can't make your heart feel something it won't
Here in the dark...
In these final hours...
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
But you won't...
No you won't...
'Cause I can't make you love me...
If you don't...

I'll close my eyes
Then I won't see
The love you don't feel...
When you're holding me
Morning will come
And I'll do what's right
Just give me till then...
To give up this fight...
And I will give up this fight

Cause I can't make you love me...
If you don't...
You can't make your heart feel something it won't
Here in the dark...
In these final hours...
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
But you won't...
No you won't...
'Cause I can't make you love me...
If you don't...

(this song was also sang by Constantine Maroulis in American Idol 4, and by Suzie McNeil in RockStar INXS...i love Suzie's version.......*sigh*)

i just bawl like a baby every time i hear this song...........n i don't know why. or do i? hehe. =.(

then he called me on the phone...

2005-09-09T12:04:00.000+08:00

and said...'i miss you...'

...as if he's off the hook...

but i still love the bastard....fuck.

...nah. i'm still mad.......AND depressed.

this is far from over.

gryffindor... yeepee...

2005-09-09T11:41:00.000+08:00

be sorted @ nimbo.net

like...duhhhhhhh...hehe.

bitchy uli

2005-09-08T16:15:00.000+08:00

sa lahat ng ayoko...inaasar ako. KAPAG ALAM na ALAM na maaasar ako...aasarin pako. nananadya pa talaga eh.

at binabalewala pako! aba! cge....bale-walaan pala ah. magaling din ako dyan.

anu ba toh...gantihan? ano toh...asaran talaga? hanggang ngayon pa ba eh ganito pa rin ang mga bagay-bagay???

mainit na nga ulo ko eh! alam ko pa kng anong buwan ngyon! ALAM KO! at walang ibang tao na may alam sa mga pinagsasasabi ko. at walang tao na nakakaalam na alam ko yun. so excuse me for being paranoid and for being bitchy...

sa lahat din ng ayoko...gumagasta ako ng load......tpos ipapasa ko pero ako mismo...walang narereceive na text sa pinasa ko mismong load! ni ndi man lang MAGPASALAMAT!!! ano? porke palima-limang piso lang kasi? ah POTA.

tangina yan. ano? puro sadya-an? game ako dyan!!!

B-R-I-N-G..it..ON.

my silver lining...

2005-08-26T15:13:00.000+08:00

i was in atc and anj txted me tawag dw me sa knya agad. ok so ako hanap nman ng fone. buti na lng may payphone sa may digital color sa 3rd level... 5 petot nga lng for 3 friggin minutes. pero nman...sulit din...i got to hear his voice haha.

pag hello eh tanong agad kng nasan ako eh so sbi ko atc ako. wat am i doing daw. di sabi ko nakatayo. tpos bkt daw. haha. pota. ang kulet. so sbi ko, kz im talking 2 him on the phone. so finally i asked why he called...ayun sbi miss lang dw ako...tpos may 'heehee' lagi na tawa. haha. pacute ang pota.

wala lang daw. he misses lng me daw. and den usap usap...mga wala lang na usapan...den i asked again, why nga he wanted me to call, kz mamya may problem nga re our problem. ayun...wala nman daw. he just wanted to say i luv yah daw and he misses me. 'heehee' uli. ako nman tawa ng tawa dumadami na tao sa tabi ko sabi ko ano b yan, un lang pala pinaguusapan naten....parang nahihiya nako so sbi nya, eh bkt ba nakkta ba daw sya. eh sbi ko, eh ako ung nakkta d2 ng mga tao na tawa ng tawa na parang sira haha.

ayun nawala ng konti ang sama ng loob ko. as usual nga tawa ako ng tawa sa mga pinagsasasabi nya...eh wala nman din nakakatawa sa mga cnsbi nya. nakakatawa kasi! puro pa 'heehee' ang tawa nya. parang bata. shyet. ang kulet ng gago leche cute cute! lumiwanag ng konti araw ko. pramis.

but oh men...im back hir in the ofis...back to work. forgot to drink my coffee kaninang breakfast so...yes, hir i am drinking coffee finally. ayoko uminit na nman ulo ko hahaha.

by kung nababasa mo toh...WAG KANG UMANO AT MAGFEELING DYAN HA. pucha. tutuktukan kita. wala lang kasi ako magawa dito sa opis. kilala kita....ssbhin mo na nman everybody wants ur body. *rolls eyes* haha. lagot ka talaga saken pag nakita kita.

tama na.

2005-08-26T09:48:00.000+08:00

aaaagh. ndi tuloy lakad nmin bukas ni anj. pucha.

wala na ngako pera...i feel so down pa...ginulo pako ng pesteng....ano na un......ndi ko pa makkta c anj.....maybe not for another wk pa...........

PUCHA!!!!! WHEN WILL ALL MY MISERIES EVER END?!?!?!?!?!

TANGINA! IM SO CLOSE TO BREAKING DOWN!!!!!!!

ayoko na talaga. im tired and i dont know what to do. i want to cry but im finding it hard to cry....i dont know why. fuck!

can someone pls grab my head and bang it on a wall REAL HARD?! LIKE RIGHT NOW! para matapos na..........

can't take this anymore!!!

2005-08-25T17:40:00.000+08:00

crap! i swear... this week has been the crappiest week EVERRR!!!!!

not only do i feel like killing somebody right now... but i also feel like burning this whole building down. fuck!

ndi nako natahimik sa punyetang....peste talaga. ginugulo nya buhay ko! TUMIGIL KA NAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKER!!!!!!!

ha! i thought ndi na sasama pa araw ko...pero NDI !!!! TALAGANG KAILANGAN SAGAD-SAGARIN NG TADHANA ANG PAGLULUKSA KO.

i just received my payslip and PUTANGINA anlaki ng kaltas saken. FUCKIN SHIT TALAGA!!!!!!!!

i swear. ndi nako lalabas ng bahay. ndi nako magpapakita kahit kanino. ndi nako kakain! ndi nako gagastos! LECHE!!!!!!!!!

bukas. glorietta here i come. pucha. (sine lang nman at bibili ng sapatos) tangina nman maawa nman kayo saken. pucha... tong sneakers ko eh nong college days pa. pucha tutubuan na ng amag toh!

fuck. i miss anj pa... tangina. ayoko na. pls tama na ang problema!!!!!!!! can i see him? can i hav more money now? can i splurge kahit konti?!?! PARANG PURO HINDI ANG SAGOT!!!!!!!! I CAN HEAR IT ALREADY!!!!!!!

FUUUUUUCK!

ouchee...

2005-08-22T18:20:00.000+08:00

my eyes hurt na......=.( wawa nman me.

no one to kiss the booboo =.(

i'm so sad. =.( i miss mah baby pa. =.(

he said he wants to see me sa 27. sweldo na nga pero sasama bako sa lakad nina mama n sis re wedding/abay gowns? or be with mah baby?

pucha. parang napakahirap pumili. DUHHH.

syempre diba mas gus2 mo nang sumama sa mahal mo and be with him the whole fuckin day coz i really fuckin miss him. yun nga lang... should i sacrifice that day just to be with my mom and sis and a decision has to be made kasi re my gown din.

watever kaver... (ika nga ng isa kong frend...haha)

pero if i go and mit mah baby...magastos. hahahaha. leche. mamya mabroke na nman ako nito. sana libre na lang ako ni anj. tangina ndi pako nakakasave!

pakshet...

ok lng. makkta ko nman sya.......hellurrr. bkt ko b pinoproblema ang ndi nman problema?!

o gumagawa lang me palusot para makapost?

o gus2 ko lang malaman nyo na naghihirap nako at masakit mata ko hehehe.

ksp lang cguro ako. hahahah. i miss anj na nga...cge na nga mit ko an sya. takte yan. screw the gowns!

tangina.

2005-08-16T16:09:00.000+08:00

tangina..im so bored. im doin the same shit everyday...i cant resign nman din and go to another company coz wala ding point dahil aalis na nman ako next year...

tangina...isa pa yan. ayoko na umalis ano ba. fuck nman o. i have 7 months left...tangina. antindi ng countdown...gusto ko maglayas!!!! ayoko umalis. gusto ko tumakbo, pumunta sa bohol or cebu or aurora...basta anywhere ndi ako mahahanap ng kung sino. so yung mga nabanggit kong places...ndi nyo nako mahahanap dyan in case maglayas ngako one time. hahahahahaha. as in. ndi nyo talaga ako mahahanap.

tangina..broke pako. iniisip ko nman san napupunta lahat ng nagastos ko? ok lng kay anj ung iba pero san na yung iba pa? ni ndi ko pa nga nabibilan sarili ko ng bagong bra o bagong rubber shoes!

ndi pa ngako bumibili ng facial wash para saken!!!

wala pako ginagastos for myself naubos na pera ko?

tangina yan.

kanina nga ndi ako kumain!!! AKO? NDI KUMAIN?

AKO BA TOH???

pucha. ni ayoko bilangin magkano na lng pera ko kasi feeling ko mas feel kong mauubos sya. basta ang alam ko puro bente lng mga bills na meron ako. and coins.

waaaaaaaaaaah! ayoko na. tangina.

alone..at last?

2005-08-08T17:58:00.000+08:00

fuck! my sister's gona be married to his long-time bf of 3 years. the wedding is on feb next year... who would've thought? the person i used to wrestle...beat up...bully all the time... is going to get married? when i found out about this....i didn't know what to do... should i cry? should i be happy. definitely...i wasn't happy. when she told me her bf proposed to her...i was like, "what!? are you ready?" and next thing i know i brushed her off. i made her leave my room w/o me saying a word.

why can't i be happy for her? i mean, what's wrong with me???

then yesterday, both of them talked to papa and told him about their plans. and...surprisingly...everyone was OK!

all except me.

it was shocking. papa was OK...mama was fine.

but i didn't know how to react...what to say...

maybe i'm kinda sad...coz she's my only sister. if she leaves me... i have no one left... no one to bully..........

it's still hard for the news to sink in... i still can't believe it.

but...one thing's for sure...i admired their courage... it's really kind of hard to muster up the courage to talk to my dad abt these stuff.

i realized that...i wanted the same thing. i wanted to be brave. i wish i could do the same...........

i realized... i could not lie abt me and anj anymore...i realized... i have to do something about this...about us.

is it just him who's scared? i guess...i'm also scared. but if we love each other...we have to admit it to them already.

if not......i think i'm not even in a relationship at all because it feels like i'm hiding. hiding what?

...and now i'm scared...of so many things...scared that anj might not want to present himself... and finally make my parents know that he exists in my life...

...i'm scared...that if this doesn't work out...that i might have to leave him....and scared of losing him...

...scared that i'll lose in touch w/ my sister...and be left all alone w/ my parents...

...scared of all the what-if's...

...before...all i ever wanted and wished for was to be left alone... to live independently...

now...it feels like...my wish is coming true... but the people i care about most and the people i want to stay in my life... are the ones who're going to leave me or will be leaving me soon...

or is it the other way around?..... =.(

Chuvaness...

2005-07-25T09:12:00.000+08:00

These are the words that are so unique and loaded in meaning that they will never find a direct translation in the English language.

Forget traditional dictionaries. Keep this.

1. Achuchu (A-chu-chu).
This refers to the pointless insincerities being said during long, involved conversations about nothing at all.

2. Ano (A-noh)
The all-around, all-purpose word for everything.

(1) Pronoun in interrogation: Ano? (What)
(2) Noun: Where is your ano? (Where is your father/mother/dead-uncle's-second-cousin)
(3) Verb: Anuhin this. (Paint/kill/maim/castrate this.)
(4) Adjective: This is so ano. (This is so pretty/big/astounding.)
(5) Interjection: Ano! (What the hell!)
(6) Substitute for genitalia: Did you ano your ano?

The use of ano is quite dangerous for the untrained ear, and must be put into the proper setting. "Honey, the ano is too long, we have to cut it," must be accompanied by the proper understanding of the context, as results may be critical to a couple's future.

3. Booba (boo-bah).
A female blessed with larger than usual mammary glands, which can be used as weapons of mass destruction.

4. Checheboreche (Che-che-boh-re-che)
Same as achuchu. It is interesting to ponder on the reason why there are so many words in the Filipino language that beautifully describe meaningless chatter.

5. Epal (Eh-pal).
An individual who believes he is God.

6. Gigil (gee-gil).
An uncontrollable desire to bite something.

7. Hipon (Hee-pon).
Literally "shrimp," whose body is eaten while its head is thrown away, this refers to a female whose body is to die for and whose face looks like it belongs to the dead.

8. Kikay (kee-kay).
Refers to individuals who carry a brush, hand wash, moisturizer, lip-gloss and various other facial enhancements in a case (aptly called a kikay kit) inside her bag. Recent inspections of various backpacks have led to the conclusion it is not a purely female trait. This breed cannot resist checking themselves out on mirrors, glass windows, bread knives, sidewalk puddles and plastic-covered notebooks.

9. Kaekekan (Ka-ek-e-kahn)
Same as achuchu and chechebureche.

10. Kilig (keel-leg).
A rush of excitement due to the actions, presence or even mention of he whom you see as the future father of your children.

11. Laglag-brip (lag-lag-brip).
The female counterpart of laglag-panti

12. Laglag-panti (lag-lag-pan-tee).
A man so incredibly hot, so heart-stoppingly gorgeous and oozing with masculinity that female underwear (whether worn by males or females) falls to the ground without effort whatsoever.

13. Indyanero (In-jan-neh-ro).
An individual who fails to appear at an appointment without prior warning. Not to be confused with individuals who appear according to Filipino time (approximately 10 minutes before the meeting is to end)

14. Japorms (Jah-porms).
Describes an individual dressed differently from the usual (typically involves clothes that have been laundered and pant legs of roughly the same length).

15. Lagot (Lah-got)
A prophesy of evil things to come.

16. Para (Pah-rah).
A term that informs the driver of a jeep to stop and pause (usually in the middle of the road) as the individual speaking intends to leave the vehicle. Dangerous for individuals as drivers seem to believe having one foot in the air is all that is necessary for descent.

17. Takusa (Ta-kuh-sa).
Derived from takot sa asawa (afraid of wife), this is a term used to describe the silent (very silent) minority of males married to feminine reincarnations of Hitler.

18. Torpe (tore-peh).
A gentleman who is desperately attracted to a female yet by some strange compulsion is reduced to a frozen mound of stuttering male whenever that female is near.

Armed with this list and a smile, you will be sure to make the proper impression not just on your new relations, but on your loved one as well. Now let's practice:

"Honey, when I first saw you, I made laglag brip, and was almost torpe. When I finally got the nerve to date you, I almost became indyanero, because I didn't think I had the right japorms. When you're around, I'm kilig, when you're not, I get gigil. You may think all this is achuchu, kaekekan, just chechecoreche, but in truth, my love, I'm so ano with you."

Girl, Bakit SINGLE ka pa rin?

2005-07-25T09:09:00.000+08:00

***namiss kong magpost dito ah...so heto...hahaha. nakakaasar nga yan...para bang, O E ANO NGAYON??? WALANG PAKIALAMANAN!***

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Ilang ulit na bang nangyari sa iyo ito? Ngayon ang kasal ng pinsan mo. Heto ka ang ganda-ganda mo. Naghanda ka talaga dahil minsan-minsan lang ang okasyon sa pamilya nyo. Kadalasan sa mga lamay na lang kayo nagkikita-kita so ngayong kasal ng pinsan mo, gusto mo namang maging maganda at mapansin nila. Aba, napansin ka nga. Ganito ang tanong ng lahat ng kaanak mo sa iyo..."O ikaw kelan ka ikakasal?" "Uy, ikaw na ang susunod ano?" Parang gusto mo na sa susunod na lamay sila naman ang sabihan mo ng "Ikaw, kelan ka susunod?"

Hindi ka dapat malungkot dahil maraming posibleng dahilan bakit hindi ka pa kinakasal hanggang ngayon. Hayaan mo silang mainip sa paghihintay. Basta kung okay ka, okay ka. Hayaan mo tulungan kita mag-isip kung bakit wala ka pa ring girlfriend/boyfriend/asawa hanggang ngayon. Naisip ko na 'yan eh.

Ito ang sampung dahilan bakit wala pa.

1. Kailangan mong mag-concentrate sa career. Hindi na uso ang mga babaeng pambahay ngayon. Kalimitan meron ng tinatawag na career. Habang hindi ka pa tinatamaan ng palaso ni kupido, hamo na munang mag-concentrate ka sa trabaho mo. Kailangan mong ma-achieve ang full potential mo bago ka mag-asawa, kasi 'pag nag-asawa ka na, tanggapin na natin, iba na ang mga prioridad mo sa buhay. Lagi ng mauuna ang pamilya. Habang feel mo pang lumaban ng lumaban sa rat race at umakyat ng umakyat sa corporate ladder, huwag mong panghinayangan na wala ka pang sariling pamilya.

2. Masyadong mataas ang standards mo. Ibaba mo kasi ng konti, baka naman kahit si Rizal hindi ma-achieve yung standards mo. Tandaan mo, si Rizal kahit na bayani medyo babaero din. Walang taong perpekto. Kahit naman ikaw di ba? Meron ka ding kapintasan? Baba mo ng konti, yung makatarungang pamantayan lang. Baka naman naghahanap ka ng Brad Pitt eh di ka naman si Jennifer Aniston. Lumagay ka lang sa dapat mong kalagyan. Baka naman naghahanap ka ng kasing yaman ni Zobel eh ikaw naman eh pobre din lang naman. Huwag. Huwag ganoon. Baka naman naghahanap ka ng smart, na gwapong, mayaman. Ate, kung ganon ang hanap mo, malamang tatandang dalaga ka na talaga. Di lahat binibigay ni Lord. Di bale kung salat sa face value, babawi na lang siguro yung sa bait at sa talino. Kung puro face value naman, at salat sa kaalaman or masama ang ugali, manalig ka na lang na baka pag pinakain mo ng gulay tumalino or ito the best, lahat naman ng tao nagbabago. Pwede pa 'yan bumait.

3. Hindi ka lumalabas ng bahay. O baka lumalabas ka nga ng bahay, sa opisina lang naman ang punta mo. Huwag ganon. Sumama ka sa mga kaibigan mo, mag-mall ka, magsimba ka, mag-outreach program ka. Huwag mongpanisin ang sarili mo sa bahay dahil wala talagang makakapansin sa iyo sa bahay. Mag-aral ka ng painting, voice lessons at Yoga. Imaginin mo kung magka-boyfriend ka na Yoga master? or di kaya, chef. O di ba cool 'yun? Magliwaliw ka sa bookstores, sa coffee shops, at kung saan-saan pang mataong lugar. Baka sakali mapansin ka doon.

4. Baka naman sobrang tapang mo. Oo nga naman, baka naman sobrang masungit ka at natatakot sa iyo ang mga potential suitors mo. Baka dapat kang maging approachable ng konti. Baka masyadong maangas ang dating mo imbis na matuwa sa iyo matakot. Baka sobrang independent mo, at parang mabubuhay ka ng wala silang lahat. Minsan may epekto rin 'yan. Baka sobrang talino ng dating mo pakiramdam nila mababara lang sila or baka 'pag pinadalhan ka ng love letter eh i-edit mo ng red ink pen.

5. Baka naman kasi losyang ka. Oo nga naman, mag-ayos ka paminsan-minsan yung tipong kahit stressed ka or overworked, eh di mo mahahalata.

6. Baka naman hinahanapan pa ni Lord ng ribbon ang para sa iyo. Natatandaan ko ang sabi ng kaibigan ko. Blessing daw from the Lord ang mga girlfriends/boyfriends. O eh baka naman hinahanapan pa ni Lord ng magandang ribbon yung regalo mo. Kasi baka daw 'pag hindi maganda ang packaging i-reject mo.

7. Baka naman nagtitipid sa toll fee yung para sa iyo. Malay mo kasi taga-Norte yung para sa iyo eh mahal naman ang toll fee. Baka nagtitipid dumaan sa walang toll kaya medyo natatagalan.

8. Baka naglakad yung para sa iyo. Parating na 'yon kaya lang mahal ang gasolina so naglakad na lang papunta sa iyo. Besides, walking is good for the heart daw. Baka sa kakalakad naligaw na. Ito pa namang mga lalaking ito, hindi magtatanong kung hindi pakiramdam nila naliligaw na sila.

9. Baka !naman sadyang torpe lang yung para sa iyo. Baka naman nag-iipon pa ng lakas ng loob o di kaya nag-iisip pa ng magandang tiyempo. Baka talagang hindi lang siya makapag-salita dahil sobrang mahiyain niya. Baka naman dapat makiramdam ka rin ng konti kasi talagang deadma ang dating nito. Baka dapat tinatanong ng unti-unti.

10. Baka naman talagang for single blessedness ka. Ipagdasal mo. Baka naman kasi pinapagod mo ang sarili mong kakaisip bakit you're still single eh hindi naman kasi marriage ang plan ni Lord for you. Paminsan-minsan magtanong ka kasi sa Kanya baka naman ikaw ang naliligaw. Baka naman ikaw ang nagtitipid. Baka naman kasi ikaw ang torpe.

Baka naman kasi ikaw ang problema. Gasgas man, pero sasabihin ko pa rin. Darating Din Yun. Kung para sa iyo, para sa iyo. Kahit iwasan mo, para talaga sa iyo.

On Fire

2005-06-05T23:17:00.000+08:00

"On Fire"
by Switchfoot

They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you'll need to leave
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows
There's more than what you've heard
There's so much more than empty conversations
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire
When He's near you
You're on fire
When He speaks
You're on fire
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see...yeah
Give me everything You are
Give me one more chance to be... (near You)

Cause everything inside me looks like
Everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
These mysteries...

You're on fire...
You're on fire...
You're on fire...

I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of everything I've never been before.
And I've been standing on the edge of me
Standing on the edge

And I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
(Yea) I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries... these mysteries... these mysteries
Ah you're the mystery
You're the mystery

Crazy people

2005-05-21T18:53:00.000+08:00

"There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blessed to end up with that somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever."-- Annette Paxman Bowen -Nikki

When i read this paragraph or whatever you call it, I can't help but think, syet tinamaan ako.

Grabe, to be honest (lam ko may magrereact...) pinupuntahan ko pa ren ung Blog ng ex ko, just to see how she's doing, if she's happy with her SO, with her work, if everything's working out for her. And I'm happy na everything's going ok for her.

I guess there is really that someone that you can never stop loving. Kahit ano pang ginawa sau nung taong un. Kahit paano pa kau nagtapos. There is just that certain space inside you that only he/she can fill up. Right?

There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. Even if u have moved on. I guess I am crazy. Miss you Jeng.

Same Ground

2005-05-20T08:12:00.000+08:00

Same Ground
By Kitchie Nadal

My love,
Its been a long time since i cried
And left you out of the blue.
Its hard leaving you that way when
I never wanted to.

Self-denial is a game
Its strange i never would've
Wanted if until there was you.

Because i have learned that love is beyond
What human can imagine,
The more it clears
The more i have to let you go.

CHORUS:
But now i don't understand why im feeling
So bad now when i know it was my idea.
I could've just denied the truth and lied.
But why am i the only one standing stranded
On the same ground?

My love because i have learned that love is a
Word gets thrown a little bit too much.
The best excuse to fill the infinite abyss
I never have to if all else fail

Would you be there to love me?
When all else fail,
Would you be brave to see right through me?

Love Song For No One

2005-05-13T10:01:00.000+08:00

yeah the best kind of love... thats what they say...well i just hope i'll find that kind of love in my life too... and hopefully SOON!!! damn... well i'll sum up what i feel and what i wanna say in john mayer's song...

" Love Song For No One "

Staying home alone on a Friday
Flat on the floor looking back
On old love
Or lack thereof
After all the crushes are faded
And all my wishful thinking was wrong
I'm jaded
I hate it

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here

Searching all my days just to find you
I'm not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know it
When I see you
Until then, I'll hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song for no one

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here

I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?

I'm tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
You'll be so good
You'll be so good for me

The Best Kind of Love

2005-05-13T09:12:00.000+08:00

dang... never did I get teary-eyed from reading a forwarded e-mail before, especially when it's about love... but this one... this one is special. it's really GOOD. it really touched my heart. a lot of the things written in the composition below... are the same things that i go through. and it made me realize why i love my baby so much... maybe i already found my best kind of love through him... this is a good read... (get a tissue just in case...heehee)

The Best Kind of Love
by: Annette Paxman Bowen

I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl. "I am young again!" she shouts exuberantly. As my friend raves on about her new love, I've taken a good look at my old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds. Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His hairline is receding and his body shows signs of long working hours and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home.

When my friend asked me "What will make this love last?" I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment, shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, and communication.

Yet there's more. We still have fun. Spontaneous good times. Yesterday, after slipping the rubber band off the rolled newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being together.

And there are surprises.

One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a "pot of gold" (my cooking kettle) and the "treasure" of a gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little presents under his pillow.

There is understanding.

I understand why he must play basketball with the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house, the kids - and even him - to meet my sisters for a few days of nonstop talking and laughing.

There is sharing.

Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens - we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after I'd read it.

There is forgiveness.

When I'm embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market, I gave him a hug and said, "It's okay. It's only money."

There is sensitivity.

Last week he walked through the door with that look that tells me it's been a tough day. After he spent some time with the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year old woman that had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the woman's husband standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I shed a few tears myself.

Because of the medical crisis. Because there were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying patients.

There is faith.

Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the frightening effects of Alzheimer's disease on her father-in-law's personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, This is too much heartache for one week.

Through my tears, as I went out to run some errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a neighbor's house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and that the joys counter the sorrows. It was enough to keep us going.

Finally, there is knowing.

I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night; he'll be late to most appointments and eat the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head.

I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not bluer: it's just a familiar hue. We don't feel particularly young: we've experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom, taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories. I hope we've got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had Scott's wedding band engraved with Robert Browning's line "Grow old along with me!"

We're following those instructions. "If anything is real, the heart will make it plain." There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blessed to end up with that somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever.

Hope you find this kind of love in your life.

Here By Me

2005-05-10T23:24:00.000+08:00

"Here By Me"
by 3 Doors Down

I hope you're doing fine out there without me
'Cause I'm not doing so good without you
The things I thought you'd never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood

So how could I have been so blind for all these years?
Guess I only see the truth through all this fear,
And living without you...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.

I can't take another day without you
'Cause baby, I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long just to hold you
And to be back in your arms where I belong

Sorry I can't always find the words to say
Everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.

As the days grow long I see
That time is standing still for me
When you're not here...

Sorry I can't always find the words to say
Everything I've ever known gets swept away
Inside of your love...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,
Right here by me.

bes frend daw... psssh!

2005-05-05T10:15:00.000+08:00

it sucks pala...wen u find out that your best frend has kept some things from you for two fuckin years... everyone knows and yet moi, her supposed best frend, was the last one to know. that's just greeeaaatt. i feel so special now. hahaha! a friend of mine told me... that maybe i wasn't always present for her to share those stuff with me...but hell...that was like 2 years ago! we wer all back in college, and most of the time i'm always with her! and now my friend tells me, maybe she's not ready to tell me yet. oh but she's soo ready to tell everyone and ready to lie to my face! that's just... fucked! if i'm what she says i am...which is her best friend, then she should know and trust me well enough that even if she does stupid things, that i'm still gonna be on her side, to support her and stay w/ her and defend her... even if she did something stupid, yes. but what she did that was really stupid was... she didn't trust me... HER BEST FREND! then i must not be her best friend... and all this time, we were just pretending. does it hurt? of course it hurts! what if i do the same thing to her? what if i tell everyone about me and my baby, and i tell the rest not to tell my best frend. 2 years after, if ever there will be a reunion, when the topic of boyfriends comes up... since we're all on that topic, i'll say to her, oh by the way, i have a boyfriend... i didn't tell you coz i was SHY. or for watever reason that would be. everyone knows and yet my best frend has no clue watsoever? isn't it ridiculous?? it is... and so... what's going on here?? last tuesday, she says that i'm her best friend in front of my other friends and yet, she just revealed something that was 2 yrs old and everyone knew...and i looked like a complete fool. tangina yan. kakairita pramis. lokohan lang pala ito... ndi pala seryosohan tong best frend best frend...

i told my friend... best frends share almost anything... they KNOW each other... they TRUST each other... if there's no trust, what is our friendship all about then? should our friendship be based on presence and visibility? 4 years of friendship wasted just because im not always VISIBLE to her? i've tried a couple of times to mit up w/ her... but she gives me all sorts of excuses... no time... no money. as if i have all of that too. but you know what, i MAKE time... i will make time... i'll make a way. coz i wanted sooo badly to talk to her. coz she's my best friend. and now this is what she does to me? i believed something for soo long and then one day you realize that all this time, you were wrong. i believed she was my best friend...but i'm starting to doubt if that is true... and if that's what she really feels. i thought love with the opposite sex can be painful... i realized..... it's more painful when you're dealing w/ ur frend... especially is she's your best friend. or is she?

Bye Bye Constantine

2005-05-02T13:24:00.000+08:00

Bye bye Constantine...

Battle of the Brainless - Part 2!!

2005-04-23T14:10:00.000+08:00

Host: Saan Binaril si Jose Rizal? Ito ay nagsisimula sa letrang L (LUNETA).

Contestant: SA LIKOD!!

Host: (Kamot sa ulo.) Matatawag din ito sa pangalang nagsisimula sa letrang B.

Contestant: SA BACK!!

Host: HindE! Ok, ang tawag sa kanya ngayon ay may initial na letrang R P?

Contestant: REAR PART!!! ( ay susme, likod pa ren!)

Battle of the Brainless!!

2005-04-23T14:04:00.000+08:00

Host: Ano ang National Animal ng Pilipinas? Nagsisimula ito sa Letrang "K"?

Contestant: KUTO!!

Host: Mali! Eto pa ang isang Clue. It tills the land.

Contestant: AH!! KUTONG LUPA!!

bday ni kwek

2005-04-17T19:41:00.000+08:00

ay...kahapon na2loy din kami sa wakas. nkta ko uli bby ko. nyahahah (as my bby wud usually express sa chat)... galing saken un eh.. gaya-gaya. anyway, we met sa ayala station. ay nako! irita ako sa knya! pina-intay nyako nong madaling araw ng day na yon. ssbing oonline sya ng 1am daw pero 2am na wala pa rin sya. TAKTE! tpos pag tinatawagan ko sya... ndi nman makakonek ung pesteng globe. tpos finally na nakatawag ako eh ang ingay-ingay ng background parang lakas ng tugtog. pangalawang tawag, ABA! TRANCE MUSIC PALA NARIRINIG KO SA BG! BA NAMAN! tapos.. "hallo? hallo?" halo halo... gagawin ko syang halo-halo eh. ndi ako marinig! so ayun.. inaway ko sya nung ngkta kmi. ndi nman away agad ang bungad ko sa knya. pero cnbi kong inintay ko sya! at irita ako! hahaha. ayaw tumabi saken ng baruho! he kept his distance and.. nakasibi...and parang pa-baby na "sorry na...sorry na... wag ka na magalit...ndi na yan galit...smile na yan.. ndi na yan galit.." takte! eh takte talaga kz ... natatawa ako sa way ng pagsorry nya. pero irita pa rin ako. pero ok na.

we first went to starbucks...bought kwek a gift (starbucks mug) and dahil ata don we wer given a free drink coupon--any drink! and any size! so ako nman...first thing i saw was strawberries and cream.. n we ordered the grande. soo sarap. hahah. ndi man lng kmi nagorder ng kape. kasi tong c by msydo madaling kausap eh. ba yan..kng ano gus2 ko agad...nasusunod. ndi man lang nagsuggest ng kape or wat.

anyway we were supposed to surprise kwek... i called my call center opispeeps dati na pumunta glorietta. den kwek has noo idea na andon pala cla.. so SURPRISE! pero nanood muna kmi ng by ko ng sine... some "alone" tym daw muna. pero takte...ndi nmin naulit ung...robots time.. uhh ANYWAY... uhh yun.. nanood kmi Sahara. haaay. wala lang. so nice na mgkasama uli kmi. no stress. ako lang nang-aaway sa knya. never naman ako inaway non, sinigawan o inapi... o in-accuse. never. kaya mahal ko un eh. and i cudn't stay mad at him for a very long tym. sira ulo talaga un.

anyway...blablabla... ndi pumunta ang mga taong dapat pumunta!! nakamfotaaahhh!!! ni isa sa knila ndi sumipot!!! pucha! nawala ang surprise ko para sa bes frend ko. tangina yan. buti na lang andyan by ko.. sabagay kaming tatlo lang nman ang close na barkada ever since. 3 lng talaga kmi lagi. lagi kmi 3 mgkasama khit saan...so siguro ok lang din. eh ayun... nag-kfc kmi after ng sine kasi sooobrang nagcraving ako sa funshots/hotshots. bulong ako ng bulong kay by na gus2 ko funshots...as in parang nanggigigil ako! as in...talagang naiihi ako sa idea ng funshots kasi gus2 ko na talaga kainin. never had a really intense craving for food before... nong araw lang na un hahah tawa ng tawa c by kz sobrang gus2 ko na ng hotshots. waahh.. sarap pag nasa-satisfy talaga ung craving mo. as in HEAVEN. dami gravy...mashed potato. hati kami sa extra large hot shots. tpos...kwen2han...tawanan as usual. ay takte...nantrip ang gago. nawala ang hikaw nya sa kaliwang tenga..so hiniram hikaw ko. eh dangling na silver na bilog hikaw ko. as in parang pang-disco. sinuot PAREHO. hahah ang ganda ng by ko! hahah. leche. dinaig pako. nagbading-badingan pa kmi.

tpos finally ayan na c kwek. mga 530 na ata un. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KWEK!! APRIL 15!! MAY UTANG ISA DYAN SAKEN NG ISAW. NDI C KWEK. KILALA MO KUNG CNO KA. *DASHBOARD DASHBOARD*... anyway, ayun ginugutom na daw c kwek. takte.. c by ang nag-order para kay kwek eh suot-suot pa rin nya dangling kong mga hikaw! tangina! gago talaga! as in ndi tinanggal. I SWWWEEAR! HE LOOKED RIDICULOUS! PERO TAKTE LA SYANG PAKE! PAGBALIK...MAY HAWAK NA TRAY AT MENTAL ATA ITO MAY HIKAW NA KALAKI-LAKI! BA NAMAN! gago tlga un..kaya mahal ko un eh.

anyway... after kfc.... tawanan.... daldalan...ikot konti glorietta...thinking where we could possibly go to next. ayun... punta na lng kmi greenbelt. so holding hands kmi tatlo..minsan c by sa gitna...weirdo nga. bka iniisip ng mga tao...para kming...wife swap or sumthin... 3some.. or sumthin. LOL hahahaha. ganon lang kz tlga kmi kaclose. anyway... bar na lang dw kmi. so punta kami absinth ba un. lalang...ako ay nagcrave na naman sa MALAMIIIIIG NA INUMIN AT GUS2 KO ICED TEA. AND DAT'S EXACTLY WAT I GOT. A BIG GLASS OF ICED TEA NA MADAAAMIIING ICE. waaah. so lakas ng music... toh namang c by... ndi rin mapigil sumayaw...dinemo pa nya talaga kay kwek ung sayaw ni will smith sa hitch na ung move na hawakan ung leg tpos isw-sway ung leg --bsta ung jologs na move hahaha. shit... da best move talaga. soo funny bby ko... ba yan. mental talaga.

pero it was almost 830 and kwek and i have to go na. wer supposed to be home by 9 dapat. well ok lang lam ko nman lalagpas kami, buti na lang c papa medyo linient na saken... and may miting sya w/ his staff of supervisors and section heads sa haus... dey have their own meeting/party der and i was hoping wen we get home, ndi pa tapos para ndi halata na medyo late uwi nmin hehe. so ap and i went to the fx station... wala pila buti na lang. by and i...haaay kissed and parted ways... a couple of times pagka-kiss and gudbye lagi may sasabihin ung isa... o kaya c april nalimutan magbayad... so uulit uli ang pagba-bye heheh. ayos. anyway we finally rode the fx... wala pang 10 mins ata...tumawag na nman saken c by. hi... ako rin..nag hi... hi na ung miss na miss mo ung tao eh kasama ko nman sya kanina. sbi ko miss ko na sya...miss nmin isa't isa uli...sbi nya try nyang tumawag bukas...w/c is today at tumawag naman sya. tpos...ayun...wala lang. lab yu lab yu...so mushy pero soooo sad. i texted him dat i feel like i wanted to go down the fx and see him again and hug him again coz i missed him so much uli.

la la la...we had a great time. nothing really spectacular happened on dat day. but i just wanted to share kwek's bday... by and i gave her a starbucks mug nga... coz 1st tym by and i went on a date...kwek met us at starbucks g4... and she saw by's mug na starbucks and gus2 din daw nya non. so we gave her one. hati daw kmi sa gift...parang daw husband n wyf kuno. anyway...i realized lang dat even though people don't go to the most "happening" places... and even though people arent doing anything at all... juz bein together...and bein so close and happy together...really makes the day so wonderful and unforgettable. i swear. i don't know what it is exactly that makes each day w/ mah baby or me my baby and kwek so great...maybe its the thought that we have each other... and we will always have each other... that makes every minute so exciting, and at the same time, peaceful and worthwhile.

last minute friday get-away...

2005-04-13T13:09:00.000+08:00

wala lang... gus2 ko lang ishare at ikwen2 para malabas ko na sa aking dibdib kung gano ako kasaya... last friday...i was sooo bored dito sa opis. bukod sa walang kalutay-lutay ginagawa ko sa opis non... at parang wala nga ring ginagawa actually... eh... namimiss ko din bby ko. so anyway, mga 3pm... online na sya. usap-usap...miss na nmin isa't isa...ermmm...lagi nman kmi ganon pag naguusap sa chat. hahah we don't seem to get tired of telling each other how much we miss each other. sooobra nang gasgas but we rili do miss each oder...na only way na meju ma-ease un is to admit it to one anoder. kaines. dati sa amber days we see each oder everyday...and we took advantage of it. now we see each oder...mukhang once a week na lang. anyway...pina-online nyako kz...he's so pissed and so down daw...he needed to talk 2 me para sumaya nman daw sya hahaha. so isip ko meron na nmang problema don sa babaeng un cgurado...nag-away na nman sila cguro. well my suspicions wer true...and he's so tired na daw of doing everything... all the work... taking care of everything... he's broke na rin and she's not even helping...yada yada yada.... so i was pissed na rin coz stressed out na bby ko... may sakit pa nga sya eh! gumagaling na nga sya... pero eto na nman... balik sa stress para makaipon...para mgkasakit uli?? hahah.. hay nako. and wyl it's true dat we both know dat he owes HER a lot becoz of wat hapend nga...and dat she's the mom... i think it's only fair naman if she helps even a bit man lng... khit konting 2long man lang.. i mean tinatamad pa magwork...puro barkada inaatupag. haay. anyway, so my bby's broke and tired and down and pissed... and ala na milk c ty. 15mins later... we rili wanted to see each oder and i told him il go to his office na lang, lend him some money, spend some time 2geder... and den head home nako. tutal...wala naman ako ginagawa noh...mas gus2 ko pa makta bby ko khit gano pa kalayo yan.

hahahah...hu wud think na ma22loy ang last minute plan namin. but i had to pretend hir sa opis na... ders an emergency of som sort sa haus. the only emergency i know i can use is my mom... may high blood kz c mama. so ayun... pero sinabihan pako ni anj ng iba pang storya na may balikbayan daw and watever... so i had to act fast...coz kng gus2 ko makarating don ng maaga... i hav to leave the office now na. eh mag-3:30pm na non. iniisip ko ung trapik and travel time...eh di ilang oras na lng kmi mgkakasama. so i told him to text me kht thru ym para kunwari may ngtxt saken. para lang tumunog cell ko para i can leave the office kunwari i had to make an important phone call.

bby ko: by
bby ko: alis ka na dyan
nikfriiik: ha??
nikfriiik: wers d phone call men
bby ko: sabihin mo nag txt na lang
nikfriiik: shit hahaha
nikfriiik: kinakabahan ako hahaha
bby ko: better ito alibi ko
nikfriiik: wat alibi
bby ko: im very good with alibis
nikfriiik: wat nga
nikfriiik: oo nga u always use dem saken eh
bby ko: your dad and mom had an emergency
nikfriiik: and?
bby ko: hey have to go somewhere
bby ko: now
nikfriiik: un lang?
nikfriiik: eh bat ako aalis?
bby ko: they were expecting titas and titos an balikbayan to go to your house
bby ko: walang tao sa house so sino magmeet dun sa visitors nila
nikfriiik: ah ok
bby ko: db....
nikfriiik: yes
nikfriiik: need at least a txt msg hirrrrrrrrrr!!
nikfriiik: by kindly go to chikka.com
nikfriiik: use d java version der
nikfriiik: txt moko dai
nikfriiik: dali
nikfriiik: dali khit hi lang
nikfriiik: tpos kunwari il call som1
nikfriiik: pupunta me pantry
nikfriiik: ay ndi..use YM
nikfriiik: dali
nikfriiik: YM
nikfriiik: YM
nikfriiik: use ym to txt me
bby ko: tapos you can tell your imediate supe that you'll try to get back if your dad comes back early
bby ko: and they will see my name
nikfriiik: ok
bby ko: ok ka lang
nikfriiik: wat?
nikfriiik: noo!
nikfriiik: ako lang babasa ng txt mo noh
bby ko: chika.com na lang
nikfriiik: para lang tumunog cell ko
bby ko: cge
bby ko: text kta i luv yah baby ko
bby ko: ok ba yun msg nyun?
nikfriiik: ok!
nikfriiik:
nikfriiik: lav yah tooooo dali na by
bby ko: yun ang send ko ayo ha...
nikfriiik: ok ok
nikfriiik:
bby ko: tapos save mo
bby ko: hehehe
nikfriiik: hahah ok
bby ko: hold on
bby ko: how will i know where you are at na?
bby ko: and where will i meet you
bby ko: and what?
nikfriiik: download mo nga chikka by
nikfriiik: so u can txt me
nikfriiik: from pc to mobile
nikfriiik: meet me sa kng anong station b ung bababaan ko
bby ko: i have nangnangs fone here
nikfriiik: sawsss
nikfriiik: tingnan mo toh
bby ko: hehehe
bby ko: sowee
nikfriiik: sowee ur ass
nikfriiik: ano ba..
bby ko: ang problem e wala na me load noh
nikfriiik: riiiiiight
nikfriiik: and u said may libre load sa opis
bby ko: oo nga
nikfriiik: o
nikfriiik: san na ung libre
bby ko: pag pay day sabay bigay sila ng card
bby ko: yun 500 card
bby ko: 15 pa e
nikfriiik: waw
nikfriiik: ubos agad ang 500
bby ko: you want i give it to you na lang
nikfriiik: at ni isang txt wala man lang ako natatanggap syo
nikfriiik: wag na'
bby ko: sira ka talaga
nikfriiik: ako pa sira
bby ko: 3 twag lang yun sakin eh
nikfriiik: uhuh
nikfriiik: wutevr
nikfriiik: so wat...chikka o me txt syo
bby ko: txt me na lang when you are at the mrt na
nikfriiik: ngekkk
nikfriiik: tapos?!!?
bby ko: ill meet you at quezon ave station
nikfriiik: ilang station un after ortigas
bby ko: ill pick you up nga e
bby ko: ba naman
bby ko: hold on
bby ko: 4th station....orts,santolan,cubao,kamuning,then que ave
bby ko: ok ka na
nikfriiik: ok
bby ko: so do i text you na
nikfriiik: yes
bby ko: now na?
bby ko: now na?
bby ko: now na?
bby ko: paksyet baby
nikfriiik: yez
nikfriiik: why? wats wrong??
bby ko: sneaky na talaga na ito
nikfriiik:
bby ko: hehehe
bby ko: covert shit is hard but so thrilling
bby ko: nyhahaha
nikfriiik:
nikfriiik: if we pull this off by omg...wer soo good
bby ko: we will be able to pull this off
bby ko: i am the master
bby ko: nyahahah
bby ko: ayan
nikfriiik:
bby ko: sent it na
nikfriiik: wala ako natatanggap pa
nikfriiik: shit magdadrama ako
nikfriiik: tangina........
nikfriiik: famas ito...w8 by..'
nikfriiik: warm up lang ako
nikfriiik:
nikfriiik:
bby ko: ahahahahaha
nikfriiik: by walang txt!!!!!!
nikfriiik: ba yan!
nikfriiik: ano b ginamit mo
bby ko: ym
bby ko: ngek ba
nikfriiik: ganito...aarte ako hihingi ako ng gagawin kz ala ako gngwa
bby ko: ok
nikfriiik: hihingi lang ako ng iq-qc na phone
nikfriiik: tpos...il w8 4 ur txt
nikfriiik: lag eh
bby ko: oki dodki
nikfriiik: la pa rin ANO BA TOHH
nikfriiik: chikka na lng kz by
bby ko: pasa load mo me 5 petot
bby ko: ill use my sim
bby ko: hehehe
bby ko: mas mabilis yun
nikfriiik: ano b sim gamitmo
bby ko: 0915 55 something
nikfriiik: so may iba ka p sim....sbi na nga b eh
bby ko: yun adti
bby ko: dati
bby ko: ano ba
bby ko: i dont know it nga e
bby ko: baby
nikfriiik: ok na! il go na by
nikfriiik: byeeeee
nikfriiik: ay cyahh
nikfriiik:
nikfriiik: il pasa load na lng syo
nikfriiik:
bby ko: text mo me ha wen your at mrt na ha
bby ko: luv yah

so der...he texted me..mga wala lang... d 1st txt was i think, he said, "the things we do just to be together..." tpos ung second and ung mga sumusunod... sweet nuthings na...wel it wasn't nuthing to me...but...wel u catch my drift. anyway, so wen he texted... takbo ako papalabas office. hahah super drama ito. tpos i juz spent som tym sa cr thinking about my plan...wat m about to do...and just how crazy it is hahahah. but i was so psyched coz i wil be able to see him agen. so ayan balik nako...pretended i was so flustered coz of da emergency at home nga. anyway, i left the office in a flash! as in mabilisang alis ito. saktong 3:30 log-out ako sa opis.

ya guys know wer i went???

QUEZON AVE! HAHAHAHA.

crazy huh? as in danglayo. pero i really didn't care. dat was d weird part eh... i didn't care. i was actually excited pa nga. syempre coz i was going to mit mah bby agen. actually sobrang biglaan ung idea na ito... and sobrang crazy talaga for me...coz dis is the very 1st time na ginawa ko toh ever...bcoz i love a person so much and i want to see him badly...hahaha. so ayun...i went der w/o any idea watsoever kng ano ggwin namin once mgkta kmi. as in...ndi ako makaplano. all i know is im going to see him and i know im going to be happy again.

takte. i never knew kng gano kalayo ung quezon ave...not until nakita ko at nilagpasan ko araneta colliseum. i thought kasi un na ung pinakamalayo. omg...buong mrt ride as in nakatayo ako. pero ok lang...sbi ko makkta ko sya sa mrt station. mga 530 na ata ako nakarating sa mrt station. and andon sya agad hehehe. i was soooo friggin happy.

hahahahh. so ayan....na2loy na ang aming covert shit hahahah. it was hella fun. we met sa station... tawid sa overpass...took the elevator pababa...hugging each oder hahaha. wel kz maliit lng din ung elevator pramis. den we walked up to...werever. i was supposed 2 pay attention to landmarks para kng sakali puntako don eh alam ko na way ko. pero after so many minutes... nawala nako. as in ndi nako nakaconcentrate sa pgmemorize ng mga daanan at bldgs. bsta sakay kmi jeep tpos kming dalwa lng laman nong jeep tpos wala lang ang saya saya hehehe. tpos... baba uli kmi...tawid overpass..tpos punta muna kmi 7-11 sa tabi lng ng bldg niya...tpos don muna me intay sa knya. he has to fire some agents daw...anim ata un. eh ndi pa pala nya lam bakt nya ifa-fire. bsta inutusan lang sya. so he has to read their files pa daw eh mamya matagalan pa sya noh. pero 15mins lng dw. after 15mins ata... ndi ko feel 15mins eh parang 30mins.....anyway sbi ko sa knya ang tagal nya pero sakto lang dw sya. wut-evah. ndi rin nya na-fire yung mga agents. for reconsideration dw sila. hahah...naawa ata. so ngyn....ndi na nmin lam ano ggwin namin o san kmi pupunta. kesa naman forever na lng kmi sa 7-11 diba. isip kmi.......

eh ayaw na nya bumalik opis....he wanted to spend time w/ me na lng dw... so he said, he'll just go up and maglog-out daw sya. eh...ala pang 5mins bumalik uli sya tinamad daw mag-logout kz akyat pa dw sya escalavator tpos baba na nman. wag na dw. alis na lang dw kmi. so dat we did. sbi ko...makati na lng kmi...kz andon fx sasakyan ko pauwi. pero ndi pa sure un...parang ok...bsta lets get out of dis place na and go sumwer. wag na dw kmi mrt...kz malayo pala ung station don sa pinagtayuan nmin. so ayun airconized bus na lang kmi.

hahaha aircon bus from quezon ave to makati kmi! grabeh commute to da max kmi. hay nako, while we wer in da bus...di syempre may radyo... tpos medyo bandang dulo kmi sa bus.. hahaha pota... ang gulo2 ng bby ko. sayaw ng sayaw...kanta ng kanta. minsan tatayo na lng tpos sasayaw don sa gitna ng bus gago tlga un. eh minsan may pababa o paakyat sa bus tpos eto sya sasayaw hahaha. kmi lang ata pinakamagulo don sa bus. actually ndi nmin napansin oras nong andon kmi sa bus eh... ndi napansin kng antagal nung travel....more like mabilis nga eh. cguro kz...we rili had a gr8 time. weird hahaha. weird ba..

so ayan.... nasa ayala ave na ata kmi...sbi nya tayo na dw...so eto tayo nman ako...tpos tayo rin sya...un pala ndi pa daw...so upo sya...eh ndi umurong ang gago hinila na lang ako pababa. upo daw ako sa lap nya hahaha gudlack nohh!!! sa laki kong toh....eh payat-payat non!! kaya daw nya hahaha. sbi ko bahala ka...after so many minutes...wala nang dugo yang legs mo. eh ok lng daw gumagalaw pa nman dw legs nya pinakita pa nya...o di cge. hahah nong tatayo na uli kmi...hahah wawa nman itsura nya don pa lang ata dumaloy dugo nya hahaha. tpos pagtayo nmin...bawal nman ngyn na bumaba don sa akala nming bababaan na nmin. ba yan!! i swear. so upo na nman kmi. ayan so tayo uli kmi... pero ung binabaan nmin...danglayo from landmark or glorietta! pucha layo pa nilakad namin. buti na lang naka-flats lang ako. takte...as in nglakad pa kmi ng danglayo! ba naman!! anyway ok lng....fine. so hhww. hahaha.

finally...nasa greenbelt na kmi...sa may parang bridge. nood b dw kmi sine.... so ayun major flash back na nman ako nong nanood kmi ng robots. AHEM. shet...eh naisip ko...ala na rin kmi money...and ala na rin kmi time msydo. by the time cguro matapos ung movie... msdyo nang late and baka ala nako maabutan na fx. pag gnon daw...ihahatid dw nyako hanggang las piñas. eh naisip ko...atc na lang kmi tambay at kung maisipan man manood ng sine...at least malapit lng ako kht medyo late na. eh isip pa rin kmi...pero un sana gus2 ko tlga. eh nasunod din gus2 ko hehehe malakas ako don eh. so ayun aba pumayag nga...so pila kmi sa fx... eh takte MEDYO mahaba. sbi nya bus na lang dw kmi...eh buti na lng bigla gumalaw ung pila. tpos after 2 fx... may nauna samen sa pila na umupo sa harapan ng fx. eh don masarap...so pinauna na nmin ung mga nasa likod nmin para kami uupo sa harapan sa susunod na fx. hahaha ang sayaaa...

sarap umupo sa harap...solo nmin aircon tpos...super comfy... *sigh*... wala lang. nakakatawa diba. umikot lang ako ahahha. umikot KAMI. parang sinundo ko lang sya sa quezon ave tpos balik las piñas. hahaha. pagdating atc....nagcable car kmi...tpos takte on da way to cable car nakita pako ng kinakapatid ko. eh mom non bes frend dati ng dad ko. syet....sbi ko takte sana ndi na lng sya magsalita noh. paalam ko kz kay mama nasa festival ako at nasa gilligan's island. lalang.... inom kmi sa cable car..... talk.... lambing..... tawanan.... talk...er..more lambingan.... la la la la la.... tpos eto sinasaraduhan na kmi ng atc.... eh klngan kmi mag-withdraw. lahat ng atm na bancnet eh ayaw maglabas ng pesteng pera!!!! lahat na ng atm tinry namin...buong atc inikot na nmin. buti na lng merong isang atm na sinwerte kmi...na nasa tapat ng mcdo..sa may side ng atc..kahilera ng south supermarket. buti na lng dinaanan nmin un kundi ala sya money. den un..... after dat upo kmi saglit sa loob ng mcdo...sa may isang function room don...andon ata ung playground ng mga bata. lalang....eh alis na dw kmi kasi may mga bata daw...eh mamya kng ano pa daw makta nila na ginagawa daw nmin .

anyway, after dat....uwi na kmi. grabeh 11pm na non. so sinamahan nyako tumawid and intay jeep. we didn't want to part talaga....he wanted to sneak into my haus pa nga sana later dat nyt....den sleep in my room. sayang. ndi lang kz msydo planado pano sya sneak in. actually may daan na nman pero.....bwelo lang kmi. haaaaaaaaaaay....we didn't want the night to end. kaines. anyway wen i rode da jeep...ndi pa actually gumalaw ung jeep. medyo nagiipon pa ng pasahero. so thru da window...nagma-mouth sya ng words. he said "thank you" a couple of times kz ndi ko magets nong una. tpos minouth ko din thank you...tpos he said i love you din...and un din ginawa ko. wala lang. kainessssssssssss. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. why do good things end so soon??? kaines.

pero ayun...natapos din....lahat ng bagay may katapusan...pero doesn't mean...walang continuation... hahaha. dis sat mit uli kmi!!! yey... heheh. pero dis tym....madaming tao nang kasama. kaines. bday kasi ni kwek!!! HAPI BDAY KWEK! lav yah frend! mwah! lav yah fwend pero takte sa sabado daming MH! kaines. hahahah.

April 9! pre bday !

2005-04-11T16:21:00.000+08:00

APRIL 9 ... ONE DAY TO GO!!!.....

8:30 AM...
I woke up to prep up .. we're going to the body dhop to the BMW that i accidentally scratched on last feb 14... and we also took my car for touch up paint and buffing also.. bec. kuya BMweeerrr accidentally hit my car also... so we're QUITS!... still his car is more expensive than mine... kase toyota lang yung akin hehhe..

9:30...
at the KME body paint shop... we waited for 30 min to an hour to buff both cars....it costed me 15 dollars each car.. pero nakikita parin yung mga gasgas... pero much better than what i did heheheh.... ONE DOWN!!!!

10:++...
we went to BEST BUY.. to get the Sony t1 camera that i lost last time we went snowboarding... my cousin bought it for 500 dollars... and i'm getting one to replace.. for 341.. shown at the website.. but when i we arrived at the store... they are facing out that model they have the T3 model ... that worth 499!!!... geezzz!! good thing that i still now a place to buy the model i was looking... for much cheaper price ... at mwave... i saw at the web site.. it was 339.95 when i checked 3 days ago... but when i'm about to order the price sudddenly increased bec they are facing out that model ... naging 357 dollars na sya.. still it's cheaper than 399... hehehe
tapos i bought the 128 mb memory stick that goes with the camera that i lost... 2 DOWN!!... ... the snow board will be next.. i hope wala na susunod na utang...

.... aaaaahhhhh basta !... i did errands that morning... i bought the camera and the memory stick that i lost...dapat nga 3 weeks ago pa yun .. pero ang tagal dumating ng ccard ko... nag laba ako.. then dryer.. at tupi ng mga damit.. linis ng loob ng car.. withdraw money.. deposit on kuya alvins bannk.. tapos i watched Ray charles... 3 times... putol putol ko kase napapanuod eh... pero it was soooo nice!!!!

... tapos ate yoyen and i invited her bf and friends to celebrate with us.. bec last time that we were together... SON (this is the right spelling of his name the vietnamese guy), francis and brian... yoyen was telling SON that it's my bday on april 10 and he wont believe her ... he said that yoyen was just making up things so that she would make Son feel bad... hehheh that we dont want to invite him or something... hehhee...
.. yoyen i planned something for my bday ... bec.. i totally forgot that my bday .. was the coming weekend and i havent made any plans for it... and i'm not that excited also.... (but i never thought that i'd have much fun!)

so 5.30 pm april 9...
we left the house to pic up the guys.. at brian's place( yoyens bf).. then we went straight to ONTARIO... DAVE AND BUSTER'S!... a place were below 21 is not allowed!?!? .. hmmmm... hehehe~!!!... INUMAN TIME!.... hehehhe... it's a resto for adults.. inside .. there's a pool tables... arcade ... BAR!!! .. etc.. eetc... that's why it's only for 21 yrs old and up ... syempre mas strikto dito...
we ate nachos... burgers! i mean BURGERS!.... then drink!?!?... LAVA FLOW... BAILEY'S... TEQUILA... i forgot the other one... then we played all night... DAYTONA!!!!.. TIME CRISIS III!! SHOOTING RANGE!!!!... BASKET BALL... JOKE POT EKLAT.. HEHHE. ETC!!! BASTA IT WAS SOOO FUN!... meron isang game , basket ball .. parang sa nga reall basket ball court.. .. eh medyo mahirap magka score.. kaya ginawa namin .. 4 kaming sabay sabay nag shoot hahahha:)) WHAT A TEAM!.. HEHEH.. tapos ung mga tickets namin from the game... pinag hati hatian namin.. pero most of the price sa akin kase ako yung may bday.. heheh... so i got PATRICK!!! HEHEH from sponge bob?! we got CHINESE FINGER TRAPS!!! HEHHEE i think it was 10 finger traps! hahha what a trip?!... we went home 12md.. cinderella kami ni ate yoyen ko eh.. hehehe

Pagmumura

2005-04-10T09:28:00.000+08:00

Dahil matulungin ako sa mga classmates ko noong highschool, isang coed ang tinuruan kong magmura. Oo, magmura! Yung "bad word." May mali kasi sa paraan nya sa pagbigkas nito. Narinig ko minsan na nagsabi sya ng "Siyeeeht!" Sabi ko, salitang Amerikano yon. At bagama't hindi eksakto, katapat noon sa Tagalog ang expression na "Lintik!" At hindi mo dapat sinasabi nang mabagal, gaya ng "Linteeeehk!" Dapat mabilis, kasi galit ka, o na-bad trip: "LINTIK!" Kaya hindi rin akmang ang "Shit!" bilang "Siyeeeht!" kasi nagmumukha kang retarded. Dapat forceful: "Syit!" Isang bagsakan: "Syit!" Parang idinudura mo ang salita: "Syit!" Naintindihan nya naman ang ibig kong sabihin. Nagpasalamat sya sa libreng tutorial. Bilang ganti, pumayag na syang pahiramin ako ng notebook sa Values Education.

May Kapitbahay kami dati na pag may kaaway ay gumagamit ng parehong english at tagalog sa pagmumura. Una, sa tagalog nya inilalabas ang mga sama nya ng loob. Pagkatapos noon, sasabihin nya ulit ang lahat sa English. Automatic ang translation, parang easter message ng Santo Papa. Pero talo sya sa isa pa naming kapitbahay na kahit walang kaaway e hitik sa mura ang salita. Oo, kahit masaya syang nagkukwento. Namumutawi sa labi nya ang mga salitang ikakaiyak ng mga guardian angel. Ang masama pa lalo, ginagawa nya ito sa kalye, mga bandang ala-una ng madaling araw, sa boses na may lakas at pwersa na tatalo sa pagre-report ni Mike Enriquez.

"Hahaha! E di tumakbo kami pare! PNI (maternal body part), may mga aso pala! Hahahaha!!! KNI (maternal body part pa rin)! Hinabol kami, PNI, nagkahulan pare! PNI talaga! Kumaripas kami ng takbo! KNI! Hahahaha! PNI'ng yan!!!"

(Wag kang mag-alala. Sa maniwala ka't sa hindi, maligayang maligaya ang kapitbahay namin habang nagkukwento.)

Pero kung iisipin, sino nga kaya ang unang Pilipinong nagmura, at bakit? Si Jose Rizal? "PNI!! Bakit nila ako dadalhin sa Bagong Bayan?" Si Andres Bonifacio? "Punitin natin ang mga PI'ng cedula!" Si Julian Felipe? "Wala ka sa tono, AH!" Si Lapu-lapu "TI! Akala ko ba itak lang ang sandata nila?" O si Malakas? "S! Bakit ngayon lang kita nakita? Matagal na ba dito sa loob ng kawayan?"

FULL HOUSE ALL NIGHT!

2005-04-08T14:01:00.000+08:00

AZA AZA FIGHTING!!!

since my kuya alvin "kuya bimmer" brought that DVD of full house.... nalulung na kami nga insan ko si ate yoyen.. hehehe... grabe ang haba nya!!!.... 9 dvd disc sya ... 2 episode in 1 disc... 2 hours per episode... 1 discs is 4 hours... GEZZZZZ.. and we try to finish 2 disc everynight .. hehehe... cute si yu Min-hyeok (luigi sa pinas) at ang ganda ni Han Ji-eun .... sana silang dalawa na lang yung nag katuluyan .. heheh... grabe!!! na hook up kami ... hehe.. ilang araw namin pinanuod yan.. after work i still watch it.. kahit 12 na ako nakakauwi .. hehehe... ADDDDIKKKK!!!... THREE BEARS!!... HEHEHEH... tats.. hope you could watch it also.. heheh.. so you could relate to us hehehe.. hindi ko alam pinalalabas din pala yun sa pinas... hehehe... nikki sino si stamos???? hehehe.. natapos na namin actually sya pero.. we stilll watch it again.. heheeh.. nakakaadik talaga!.. hehehe... sabi ng iba mas nakakatawa daw yung tagalog version.. hope i could watch how it was translatedd.. kase nakakataawa na sya na may subtitle na english eh.. paano pa kaya kung tagalog.. ..

natutuwa kami ni ate yoyen kay yu Min-hyeok kase yung mga tanong nya ..SOBRANG BIGAT!.. tapos yung ending nila .. SUPER DUPER UBER BITIN!.. galing nilang mang bitiin... (alam ko sadya yung pang bibitin na yun.. pero ang galing ng mga last lines... tapos sabayan ng theme song nila... hehehhe hahaah...) wala lang nag comment lang ako sa FULL HOUSE.. kase na

First time mo... oo... first time ko....

2005-04-06T11:09:00.000+08:00

talagang 1st time ko... letche tong blogger na toh pinahirapan ako... grabe na-bobo ako dito sa blog ah! pati help binasa ko pa at lahat... just to figure things out... at kung bakit hindi ko ma-view yung plus sign na sinasabi ni ej pra makapag post ako... freakin plus sign!!! so i went straight to the guru... (master nikki...) eh lintik na toh.. meron na pala ako dating username.. so 2 tuloy yung gamit ko and im currently in the new one so i cant view this blog... so nik invited me again and erased the old one... eh kse nman noh.. nakalimutan ko na yung username at password ko b4... i never posted in this blog before.. lately ko lang binungkal toh... so ngayon.. after ilang mos. di ko na tuloy maalala.. in a nut shell... moral lesson of the story... tandaan ang mga username at passwords mo sa mga sites... kaya starting from now.. im making my data base of all my accounts.. to monitor all my usernames and passwords... hahahaha :> whew... mag- give up na san ko dito sa blog eh... pero never say never... hehehe and never give up without a fight hehehe.... ;->

HELP!!!!

2005-04-05T15:43:00.000+08:00

haaaaay... one of my moms friend here wants me to visit her .. and she wants to treat me out... and it feels awkward... i barely know her.. we only met once.. and she's teasing me to her son... and i bet!.. that guy is not my type.. hheeh joke! (hindi ko pa nikikita yung anak nya .. pero she's tryong to link me to her son).. bawal mag salita ng tapos.. pero... nakakailang eh!?... i dont want any set up... i'm not at ease with those kinda arrangements... she wants me to go to her place this weekend and celebrate with her... geezzz... naiilang ako... hehhehe... LALAKI PO AKO!... hahah joke!... nge.. mahiyain nga ako eh!... ano ba!?.. heeheh. yun lang... di ko alam kung paano iiwasan yung topic na yun.. please help!... i dont want to avoid them all bec. they are teasing me and everything... i dont know how to react on things like those... PLEASE HELP!!!!

another near death experience...

2005-04-05T15:20:00.000+08:00

haaay.. akala ko mamamatay na ako! haaha :D 2nd time na to! pero ibang situation naman.. yung una kase uminom ako ng beer .. tapos i'm all red and still drinking.. pero light lang yun!... flavored beer nga lang eh.. after one bottle hindi ko na magalaw yung katawan ko tapos na ninilim na yung paningin ko hhehe.. tapos i was trying to move my body pero hindi sya mag cooperate sa mind ko.. .. so i tried jumping around and running around the house ... para magka malaay ako ulit.. i was asking my self na nga nun if i'm ready to die... and that i reallize i dont want too yet... i want to see my family .. and go back to pinas.. i dont want to die here with out my family... tapos nag karoon ng big beat yung puso ko tapos feeling ko nag stop yung puso after that.. hindi yun yung time na hindi ako makagalaw.. ehhe... pero after the running and jumping.. ang bilis na ng tabo ng puso ko... haaaay.. buhay pa ako...

pero this time iba naman...
i had a bad dream, i was super duper uber GALIT daw parang dragon ball ... na gusto kong saktan yung tao sa panaginip ko.. na parang gusto ko silang patayin pero hindi .. ayaw ko parin .. kase alam ko masama pumatay ng tao... at gusto ko paramdam kung gaano kasakit yung nararamdaman ko.. sa panaginip ko pinagsasamapal ko daw... tapos gusto kong kalmutin.. pero wala akong kuku... as in nag wawala daw ako.. parang nakwalang ungoy! ... heheh.. joke!... pinag tatawanan ko lang yung sarili ko sa panaginip ko.. pero... what i dont know... in reallity...
HEART BURN AKO!... or something like that.. hindi ko naman masabi na attake sa puso... nagising ako sa sakit ng dibdib ko.. na parang puputok yung ugat ko sa dib dib.. parang heart burn na hindi... na hindi ako makagalaw sa kama... pag huminga naman ako lalo sumasakit.. so i tried not breeathing for a couple of minutes.. kase parang hose... nag clog... kaya parang puputok yung hose.. so you must slow the flow of water para hindi na bibigla yung hose.. parang ganun yung naramdaman.. ko.. pero bumalik ako ulit sa tulog ko.. hhehe... at nagising naman ako kanina.. hehe.. HAAAAT BUHAY NANAMAN AKO ;OP

huwaaaaaaaaaaat?

2005-04-05T09:04:00.000+08:00

uhh... nanay na ata ako. NDI! NDI UNG SA INIISIP NYO. nakalabas na ung baby... and i'll be a mom to him na. this is soooo crazy. me, my hunny bunny, and his baby (who wil by my baby too) will be this...one big happy family...??? is this real? is this for real??? seems so surreal to me. yes i hav thought about it before... but now, para bang ngayon ko lang nalaman. matindi ung dating ngyon. parang shit... nashock ako... may anak nako!?!?!? TANG...INA. shit. kaya ko ba ito? pero... mukha naman OK lang din ako. im just scared na baka...... i wont be a good mom. im so scared. OK nga lang bako? i'm really petrified at the idea that i might fail. teka... asan bako? sino ako!? hahaha. omg im sooo not myself right now.

pho... sung... banh bao...

2005-04-04T10:05:00.000+08:00

hehehe.. it was fun though i was soooo quite.... hehee... yoyen introduce me to her friends before her graduation and lately.. she's dragging me with them ... and i'm having fun also... it's fun to be with people who are different from your culture... i'm still shy and trying to read them....

TODAY... was cool and fun!... i wasnt supposedly to come to their dinner... because i barely know "phu sung" who is treating them... he is a vietnamese, friend of yoyen from school... whenver i see him it reminds me of benny..... hehe.. no strings attached... it's because of his nose and i eyes...and skin... their trip today was not that quiet different... my cousin , her bf and francis another friend of my cousin who is all 100% pinoy but grew up here at USA.... just wanted to taste vietnamese food which they never ever tasted in their whole life (wierd pips... never tasted vietnamese foood:D.. but normal) so we went down to the southern part more than 45 miles i assume... but not sure.. where the vietnamese people are... the homies of vietnamese.... hehe... we almost shook the town upside down just to find the good place to eat vietnamese food.. but it was fun!....

aftter an hour or two.. we decided to stop to any PHO restaurant that we see 1st... there we ate... i never know that all PHO restaurants have the same menu list... for example... number 3. pho rare rice noodles.... it will be alwasy number 3 and will be always pho rare rice noodle to all menu of pho restaurant you go... hehehe...

gezzzz the serving is toooooo big.. that i cant barely finish it!... it was sooo amazing that yoyen's bf , brian , finished his meal.. finished half of yoyen's and .... we went to another place to eat ... this time sung wants us to taste this siomai.. but the place was already closed so we went to a vietnamese bakery... we francis and brian ordered white bread 6 inches roast beef sandwishes.. like in subways... geeeezzszz they arent fulll yet to what we ate at the pho restaurant... after that ,they got BANH BAO (siopao sa pinoy)... geeeezzz!!!... lakas nila kumain...!!!..

sung, francis and brian are so funny when they tease each other... sung seems sensitive with his nationality .. but he can still handle the jokes.... .. all night francis was teasing sung to his x gf.. SUMMER... whome i dont know... yoyens joke ( so sung.. summer broke up with you last summer?), francis (there's dis one gurl that i asked which season do you liked best? the gurl answered.. PEPPER.... hahaha!!!... not SEASONING!)

( they say that sung doesnt want to hear about her anymore and he seem sensitive with that topic but to night...... he handled things ok... )

.... it was nice going out with new people... though i'm still quite silent whenever i'm with them :D.... si ej ba yun?!
haahha:)) ... TAKOT MAG ENGLISH! HAHHAA:)) joke!.... nahihiya pa.. hahaha:))

m so friggin happy...

2005-04-03T13:20:00.000+08:00

inggit ako kay j... kung san san na nakakapunta heheheh. anyway, ako rin! pucha.. khpon ngkaron din me lakad. anyway... i was w/ my baby, from 2pm to i think 7pm. we watched robots... pero ndi nmin naumpisahan. mga 10mins ata namiss nmin. anyway... pucha. PUCHA. un lang masasabi ko hehehe. sarap pala umulit ng movie *cheesy smile - actually smile from ear to ear* heehee. tangina. waaaah. as much as i want to go into detail... wag na nga lang. bwahahahaha. tangina. never had a better day than yesterday. pramis. yesterday... was awesome. tangina... i remember, eh di un nga hinintay nmin uli magumpisa ung robots... and... well... lumagpas na kmi don sa part na naabutan nga nmin.. ayaw pa nmin umalis. sooo... uhhh.. bsta heehee... ngtagal muna kmi don... errr... tpos... uhhh nong finally tumayo na kmi, tangina, hahahah shyet... 2 rows behind us... may bata... nanonood ng robots.... MAG-ISA! hahaha. tangina... ano kaya nakita nya... na ndi dapat makita...err. omg. *evil grin* he's like.. wat... 12 yrs old? 15? hahahaha. honestly.. dat was the looongest... thing.. evr..i've done.... uhhhhh.... oo maganda nga pala yung robots. mmhmm. as in panoorin nyo.

ONE of THE NICEST THINGS...

2005-04-03T09:22:00.000+08:00

hehhee... not really gimik.. we went to THE GROVE... window shopping ....SUPER ALIW!!! para kang nasa ibang bansa talaga! hehe... parang green belt 3 na disney na paris.... hehhee... sarap ng feeling to be there... the ambiance?!?!?!... SOOOO AWESOME!!!.... yung street walk is made of bricks... tapos there's jazz music ... on the street to set hte mood... frank sinatra! oh di ba!? sweet?! ... sarap siguro mag date dun!.. still i had fun with my officemates...... tapos we ate at the farmers market (food court) at one of the buffet grill ....where all the serbidor ay GUWAPO!!!!... PERO BADING!..... putcha! sayang talaga sila!!! ehheh... chinese yung nag slice ng steak, tapos yung kahero / kahera... european! oh di ba?! GUWAPO TALAGA!... sayang hindi ko sila na kunan ng pix.. kase ang tatatray nila sa babae eh..hehe lalo na yung european... pero yung chinese... mabait sya and he knows to smile kahit girl ka .. hehe.. at yung kahera.... obvious na bading sya!.... kase ang ganda ganda ng girl na nasa likod ko hindi nya tinitingnan.. pero tinitingnan nya yung guy na nasa likod namin.. and the funny part ... he's looking at his BUTT!... then bitting his lips.. hehehe... kitang kita!.. hahaha!!!.. he's sooooo obvious! heehhe.. ..

tapos we went window shopping... the mall is .... WAAAAAAAY AWESOME!!!!! DAMMMMN AWESOME!... we went to forever 21... BANANA REP!! ( geeeezzz SUPER LAKI!!!! parang it's a mall it self!!! .... 2FLOORS PA! ... NA PURO BANANA REP!!! ) .. nike also.. the interior was nice.. i like their flooring.. . "feel at home..." hindi na namin na ikot lahat kase it was already 9 pm... nag sasara na yung mga shops... basta .. ang lalaki ng bawat botique.... parang sta. monica promenade... pero way cooler!.. kase puro puti lang.. at high class sya... nakakatawa pa nga eh.. while walking at the side street... by the way... it's an out door mall.... meron one old white guy.. with his .. 3 year old grandson (i'm just assuming that he is the grand pa) .. eh mama nels and i where talking about the mall .. na .. it's a high class mall..kase it 's like the makati of the philippines.. or alabang where rich people hang out or like the fort.. but the middle class people can still hang out...... pero iba parin yung RODEO DRIVE (dun.. rich people talaga! hehe beverly hills na yun eh! where you can see HOLLYWOOD STARS TAGALA... hehehe)... hhhehe
... end of the commercial... it's kinda weird to hear a white guy talking IN STRAIGHT TAGALOG! hhehhe... ackward FEELING... kase hindi sya slang tagalog... straight tagalog! .. hehe... so yun....

tapos after all the shop had closed... lakad lakad lang kami kase the mall is still open for fine dinnings... and book store "barns and noble" it's up until 11 pm... tapos at the othe end of the mall there's this fountain ... the designer of the fountain is also the one that designed the fountain of BELAGIO hotel at vegas... there is a certain time where the fountain dance... ehhe... literaly dance... kase may music sya at sinasabayan nya yung soothing musicof FRANK SINATRA... feeling mo tuloy nag s-swing ka din... i took a video of it using my phone.. (alam ko jologs.. pero.. it's soooo nice) if you'd see it .. it's sooo romantic... sabi ko nga eh kung ... may pro-propose sa akin.... hehe... one option is there.. hhahaha!.. he could set up the place ... para solo namin yung area then set a table in the middle of the bridge... where the fountain show is ..... together with the soothing music.... then ask me for a dance... and propose... SWEEEEEEEET!... ... samahan mo pa ng lighting effects... feeling mo na sa paris ka ... heheh :D....
sarap mag imagine.. hahahha:D

after the dreaming at the fountain.. umuwi na kami .. kase gabi na eh... baka mapagalitan ako hehehe.... minsan lang naman ako lumabas eh... .. haaay i miss my life at pinas... na nakakagimik ako ... at madami akong naaaya.. hehe.. dito.. wala bahay uwi... pag kasama ko lang sila mama nels at nickee ako nakaka pasyal... :D

STILL I HAD SOOOO MUCH FUN THERE!... nabusog yung mata ko! hahaah:))

FOR THE BLIND WOMEN...

2005-04-02T05:28:00.000+08:00

Inspired quotes from Sex in the City...

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.

2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.

3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, leave him lone.

4. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

6. Don't force an attraction.

7. Slower is better.

8. Never live your life for a man before you findwhat makes you truly happy.

9. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

10. Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. God does things decent and in order.

11. Don't settle.

12. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

13. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship--take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?

14. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

15. Honorable men take care of their business and aren't involved in a whole lot of mess.

16. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

17. There's only one 'reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't want you.

18. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

19. You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.

20. Always put yourself and your happiness first.

21. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.

22. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

23. If he doesn't call, he just isn't that interested.

24. Be honest and upfront.

25. Know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.

26. Don't fall for the "I'm confused role". Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don't wait for him, move on).

27. If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).

28. There's more than physical abuse, there's emotional and mental abuse. If he causes any of them...flee.

29. You cannot change a man's behaviors. Change comes from within.

30. Don't let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself -- double-standard.

31. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job.

32. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

33. Demand respect and if he can't give it, he can't have you!

34. Don't compete with other woman, but be aware that men are attracted to what they see.

35. If you think he is cheating, he probably is.Confront him right away and if you feel he's lying, let him go.

36. Actions speak louder than words.

37. Never let a man define who you are.

38. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.

39. Never borrow someone else's man.

40. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

41. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you and it doesn't mean that you are meant to be with him.

42. To use painful hard-won wisdom -- 'get it right' the next time.

43. Know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1person in your life.

44. Love is a verb ...

45. Learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable-available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.

P-U-T-A-N-G-I-N-A TALAGA.

2005-04-01T09:55:00.000+08:00

pucha. this day is one supper stinkin shitty day. dahil sa sobrang mahal ko ang isang tao... kailangan ko sya pakawalan. at putangina ang sakit. pero ganon talaga ang buhay. sa sobrang sakit... wala nako masabi ngayon. ano pa ba masasabi ko besides PUTANGINA YUNG BABAENG UN. putangina nya. putangina tong araw na toh. letse! wat a fuckin crappy day. FUCK TLAGA. FUCK.